Dave's E-Mail

Animals are Amazing

2008-07-03T13:09:00.001-04:00

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed his stupid ass against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

This is for all of my friends who send me those heartwarming stories.

STORIES THAT CAN BE TOLD IN CHURCH

2008-04-04T23:20:00.000-04:00

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, 'Why is the bride dressed in white?'' Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.' The child thought about this for a moment then said, 'So why is thegroom wearing black?'
~~~~~~~~~~
A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed, 'Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let me be late!'While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She gotup,brushed herself off, and started running again! As she ran she once again began to pray'Dear Lord, please don't let me be late...But please don't shove me either!'
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, 'My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.' The second boy says, 'That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100.'The third boy says, 'I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!'
~~~~~~~~~~~~
An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, 'They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A police recruit was asked during the exam, 'What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?' He answered,'Call for backup.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem . A small child replied, 'They couldn't get a baby-sitter.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to 'Honor thy father and thy mother,' she asked, 'Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?' Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and she said, 'Johnny, what is the matter?' Little Johnny responded, 'I have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to the other, 'What do you think about all this Satan stuff?'The other boy replied, 'Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It's probably just your Dad.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Brick

2008-03-16T22:16:00.002-04:00

Read It. Read this today and don't delete it if you are too busy!! You'll see.

THE BRICK

A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door! He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot where the brick had been thrown.

The angry driver then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kid and pushed him up against a parked car shouting, 'What was that all about and who are you? Just what the heck are you doing? That's a new car and that brick you threw is going to cost a lot of money. Why did you do it?'

The young boy was apologetic. 'Please, mister...please, I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do,' He pleaded. 'I threw the brick because no one else would stop...' With tears dripping down his face and off his chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car. 'It's my brother, 'he said. 'He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up.'

Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, 'Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me.'

Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair, then took out a linen handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts. A quick look told him everything was going to be okay. 'Thank you and may God bless you,' the grateful child told the stranger. Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the boy! push his wheelchair-bound brother down the sidewalk toward their home.

It was a long, slow walk back to the Jaguar. The damage was very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented side door. He kept the dent there to remind him of this message: 'Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!'

God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts. Sometimes when we don't have time to listen, He has to throw a brick at us. It's our choice to listen or not.

Thought for the Day:

If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it.

If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it.

He sends you flowers every spring.

He sends you a sunrise every morning Face it, friend - He is crazy about you!

Send this to every 'beautiful person' you wish to bless.

God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow,sun without rain, but He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way.

Read this line very slowly and let it sink in...

If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

Pass this message to seven people except you and me.

You will receive a miracle tomorrow ( just do it)!

Attitude

2007-12-13T21:43:00.000-05:00

There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror, and noticed she had only three hairs on her head.

Well," she said, "I think I'll braid my hair today?"

So she did and she had a wonderful day.

The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head.

"H-M-M," she said, "I think I'll part my hair down the middle today?"

So she did and she had a grand day.

The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head.

"Well," she said, "today I'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail."

So she did and she had a fun, fun day.

The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head.

"YEA!" she exclaimed, "I don't have to fix my hair today!"

Attitude is everything.

Be kinder than necessary,for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

Live simply, Love generously, Care deeply, Speak kindly.......

Leave the rest to God

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...It's about learning to dance in the rain.

Something cool that Xerox is doing

2007-11-18T12:02:00.000-05:00

If you go to this web site, www.LetsSayThanks.com you can pick out a thank you card and Xerox will print it and it will be sent to a soldier that is currently serving in Iraq . You can't pick out who gets it, but it will go to some member of the armed services.

How AMAZING it would be if we could get everyone we know to send one!!! This is a great site. Please send a card. It is FREE and it only takes a second.

Wouldn't it be wonderful if the soldiers received a bunch of these? Whether you are for or against the war, our guys and gals over there need to know we are behind them...

Dart Test

2007-07-07T23:22:00.000-04:00

THIS IS A POWERFUL MESSAGE. PLEASE READ ALL OF IT. I AM PASSING IT ON BECAUSE I AM CERTAINLY NOT ASHAMED TO DO SO.

In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke, it's not funny, it's intended to get you thinking..............

Dart Test... A young lady named Sally, relates an experience she had in a seminary class, given by her teacher, Dr. Smith. She says that Dr. Smithwas known for his elaborate object lessons.
One particular day, Sally walked into the seminary and knew they were in for a fun day. On the wall was a big target and on a nearby table were many darts. Dr. Smith told the students to draw a picture of someone that they disliked or someone who had made them angry, and he would allow them to throw darts at the person's picture.

Sally's friend drew a picture of who had stolen her boyfriend. Another friend drew a picture of his little brother. Sally drew a picture of a former friend, putting a great deal of detail into her drawing, even drawing pimples on the face. Sally was pleased with the overall effect she had achieved.

The class lined up and began throwing darts. Some of the students threw their darts with such force that their targets were ripping apart. Sally looked forward to her turn, and was filled with disappointment when Dr. Smith, because of time limits, asked the students to return to their seats. As Sally sat thinking about how angry she was because she didn't have a chance to throw any darts at her target. Dr. Smith began removing the target from the wall.

Underneath the target was a picture of Jesus. A hush fell over the room as each student viewed the mangled picture of Jesus; holes and jagged marks covered Hi s face and His eyes were pierced.

Dr. Smith said only these words.... "In as much as ye have done it unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto Me." Matthew 25:40.

No other words were necessary; the tears filled eyes of the students focused only on the picture of Christ.

This is an easy test; you score 100 or zero. It's your choice. If you aren't ashamed to do this, please follow the directions.

Jesus said, "If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you, before My Father." Not ashamed ... paSS this on. Ashamed ... delete it.

Isn't it funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell.
Isn't it funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says.
Isn't it funny how everyone wants to go to heaven provided they do not have to believe, think, say, or do anything the Bible says. Or is it scary?
Isn't it funny how someone can say "I believe in God" but still follow Satan (who, by the way, also "believes" in God ).
Isn't it funny how you can send a thousand jokes through e-mail and! they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing.
Isn't it funny how the lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but the public discussion of Jesus is suppressed in the school and workplace.
Isn't it funny how someone can be so fired up for Christ on Sunday, but be an invisible Christian the rest of the week.
Are you laughing?
Isn't it funny how when you go to forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them.
Isn't it funny how I can be more worried about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me.
Will YOU pass this on? ... I did

For You

2007-07-07T23:20:00.000-04:00

God determines who walks into your life....it's up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go."

I need this back. If you'll do this for me, I'll do it for you....
When there is nothing left but God, that is when you find out that God is all you need. Take 60 seconds and give this a shot! All you do is simply say the following small prayer for the person who sent you this.

Father,
God bless all my friends & family in whatever it is that You know they may be needing this day! And may their life be full of your peace, prosperity and power as they seek to have a closer relationship with you. Amen.

If you send it on to five other people, including the one who sent it to you , within hours you caused a multitude of people to pray for other people. Then sit back and watch the power of God work in your life.

LET IT REALLY SINK IN - THEN CHOOSE .

2007-07-07T22:37:00.001-04:00

John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!"

He was a natural motivator.

If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked him, "I don't get it!

You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?"

He replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or ... you can choose to be in a bad mood.

I choose to be in a good mood."

Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it.

Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life I choose the positive side of life.

"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested.

"Yes, it is," he said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood.

You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life."

I reflected on what he said. Soon t hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower.

After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back.

I saw him about six months after the accident.

When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins...Wanna see my scars?"

I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.

"The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter," he replied. "Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or...I could choose to die. I chose to live."

"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked.

He continued, "..the paramedics were great.

They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man'. I knew I needed to take action."

"What did you do?" I asked.

"Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said John. "She asked if I was allergic to anything. 'Yes, I replied.' The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Gravity'."

Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead."

He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude.. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully.

Attitude, after all, is everything .

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34.

After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

You have two choices now:

01. Delete this.

02. Forward it to the people you care about.

You know the choice I made.

KEEP HER GOING.........................

2007-07-07T21:54:00.000-04:00

This woman is walking the World for Breast Cancer.
Please pass her on so that she can reach her destination.
Say a prayer for all those who are affected by this terrible disease.
She's walking around the world - via e-mail!! Pass it on so she can get there!
Please hit your forward button, so the woman stays animated.

Please keep her going.............

I HOPE I DO NOT HEAR OF ANYONE BREAKING THIS ONE OR SEE DELETED

2007-07-07T21:16:00.000-04:00

This is a ribbon for soldiers fighting in Iraq. Pass it on to everyone and pray.

Something good will happen to you tonight at 11:11 PM. This is not a joke. Someone will either call you or will talk to you online and say that they love you. Do not break this chain. Send this to 13 people in the next 15 minutes. Go.

SLEEP LAST NIGHT?
Bed a little lumpy...
Toss and turn any...
Wish the heat was higher...
Maybe the a/c wasn't on...
Had to go to the john...
Need a drink of water...

Scroll down

Yes... It is like that!

Count your blessings, pray for them,

Talk to your Creator and the next time when...

the other car cuts you off and you must hit the brakes,
or you have to park a little further from Walmart than you want to be,
or you're served slightly warm food at the restaurant,
or you're sitting and cursing the traffic in front of you,
or the shower runs out of hot water,

Think of them...

Protecting your freedom!

DO NOT DELETE-PLS PASS ON-Message from Iraq

The proud warriors of Baker Company wanted to do something to pay tribute to our fallen comrades. So since we are part of the only Marine Infantry Battalion left in Iraq the one way that we could think of doing that is by taking a picture of Baker Company saying the way we feel. It would be awesome if you could find a way to share this with our fellow countrymen. I was wondering if there was any way to get this into your papers to let the world know that "WE HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN" and are proud to serve our country! Semper Fi
1stSgt Dave Jobe

The attached photo was forwarded from one of the last U.S. Marine companies in Iraq. They would like to have it passed to as many people as possible, to let the folks back home know that they remember why they're there and that they remember those who've been lost.

8 X 8 Rule

2007-07-07T21:13:00.000-04:00

Whether you send this or not, I love you and pray a blessing on you today.

When you reach the end of your rope you will find the hem of His garment.I'm not breaking this one. This is ABSOLUTELY beautiful...

I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out thereisn't, than live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is. You are my 8 in 8 seconds. I am not breaking this. No way! I'M TOLD THIS WORKS!!!!!

Bishop T.D. Jakes "8 Second Prayer." Just repeat this prayer andsee how God moves!!

"Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, and bless me, my family, my home, my finances, and all of my friends, in Jesus' name. Amen."

Pass this message to 8 people {EXCEPT YOU AND ME}. You will receive a miracle tomorrow! I HOPE that you don't ignore and let

Subject: Good Info

2007-07-07T21:10:00.001-04:00

NEVER KNEW THIS BEFORE...I wonder how many people know about this? A 36 year-old female totaledher car. A resident of Kilgore , Texas , she was traveling betweenGladewater & Kilgore. It was raining, though not excessively, when hercar suddenly began to hydro-plane and literally flew through the air. Shewas not seriously injured but very stunned at the sudden occurrence! When she explained to the highway patrolman what had happened he told hersomething that every driver should know - NEVER DRIVE IN THE RAIN WITHYOUR CRUISE CONTROL ON. She had thought she was being cautious by settingthe cruise control and maintaining a safe consistent speed in the rain. But the highway patrolman told her that if the Cruise Control is on andyour car begins to hydro-plane -- when you r tires lose contact with thepavement, your car will accelerate to a higher rate of speed and you takeoff like an airplane. She told the patrolman that was exactly what hadoccurred. The patrolman said this warning should be listed on the driver's seatsun-visor - NEVER USE THE CRUISE CONTROL WHEN THE PAVEMENT IS WET OR ICY,along with the airbag warning. We tell our teenagers to set the cruisecontrol and drive a safe speed - but we don't tell them to use the cruisecontrol only when the pavement is dry. The only person the accident victim found, who knew this (besides thepatrolman), was a man who had had a similar accident, totaled his car andsustained severe injuries. If you send this to 15 people and only one of them doesn't know aboutthis, then it was all worth it. You might have saved a life. NOTE: Some vehicles will not allow you to set the Cruise Control when thewindshield wipers are on. The Toyota Sienna Limited XLE is one of them. Here's some more info on the subject:http://www.snopes.com/autos/techno/wetroad.asp

$20.00

2007-07-07T21:00:00.000-04:00

$20.00

Sometimes we just need to be reminded!

A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up.

He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this. He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.

He then asked, "Who still wants it?" Still the hands were up in the air.

Well, he replied, "What if I do this?" And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.

"Now, who still wants it?" Still the hands went into the air. "My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you. The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE. You are special- Don't EVER forget it."

If you do not pass this on, you may never know the lives it touches, the hurting hearts it speaks to, or the hope that it can bring. Count your blessings, not your problems.

And remember: amateurs built the ark ... professionals built the Titanic.

If God brings you to it - He will bring you through it.

Pass this message to 7 people except you and me.

You will receive a miracle tomorrow.

Wow! This hits home!

2007-06-18T23:55:00.000-04:00

This is without a doubt one of the nicest good luck forwards I have received. Hope it works for you -- and me!

You have 6 minutes

There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not superstitious. This has been sent To you for good luck from the Anthony Robbins organization. It has been sent around the world ten times so Far. Do not keep this message.This must leave your hands in 6 MINUTES. Otherwise you will get a very unpleasant surprise. This is true, even if you are not superstitious, agnostic, or otherwise faith impaired.

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.
FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.
SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.
EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much.
NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.
TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.
THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"
FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.
SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson
SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: R espect for self; Respect for others; and responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.

Now, here's the FUN part! Send this to at least 5 people and your life will improve. 1-4 people: Your life will improve slightly.5-9 people: Your life will improve to your liking.9-14 people: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next 3 weeks15 and above: Your life will improve drastically and everything you ever dreamed of will begin to take shape.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart. Do not keep this message

REAL FRIEND TEST !

2007-06-18T23:53:00.000-04:00

This is GOOD..I expect it back too!

A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself (and doesn't feel even the least bit weird shutting your 'beer/Pepsi drawer' with her foot!)

A simple friend has never seen you cry. A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears..

A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names. A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.

A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party. A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.

A simple friend hates it when you call after they've gone to bed. A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.

A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems. A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.

A simple friend wonders about your romantic history. A real friend could blackmail you with it.

A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument. A real friend calls you after you had a fight.

A simple friend expects you to always be there for them. A real friend expects to always be there for you!

A simple friend reads this e-mail and deletes it. A real friend passes it on and sends it back to you!

Pass this on to anyone you care about......if you get it back you have no beginning, no end. It keeps us together, like our Circle of Friends.

Today I pass this on to you. Pass it on to someone who is a friend to you.....INSTANTLY WHEN YOU RECEIVE THIS LETTER, YOU'RE REQUESTED TO SEND IT TO AT LEAST 10 PEOPLE, INCLUDING THE PERSON WHO SENT IT TO YOU.

When you are down to nothing ... God is up to something

TIBETAN PERSONALITY TEST

2007-06-18T23:50:00.000-04:00

Take your time with this test and you will be amazed. I did this last year when this came around and a spiritual wish I made did happen - in fact all year long.

The Dalai Lama suggests you read it to see if it works for you. Very Interesting.

Just 4 questions and the answers will surprise you.

Be honest and do not cheat by looking up the answers. The mind is like a parachute, it works best when it is opened. This is fun to do, but you have to follow the instructions very closely. Do not cheat.

MAKE A WISH BEFORE BEGINNING THE TEST!

A warning! Answer the questions as you go along. There are only 4 questions and if you see them all before finishing, you will not have honest results.

Go down slowly, and complete each exercise as you scroll down.

Don't look ahead. Get pencil and paper to write your answers as you go along.

You will need it at the end. This is an honest questionnaire which will tell you a lot about your true self. Give an answer for each item. The first thing that comes to mind is usually your best answer. Remember - no one sees this but you.

(1) Put the following 5 animals in the order of your preference: Cow, Tiger, Sheep, Horse, Pig

(2) Write one word that describes each one of the following: Dog, Cat, Rat, Coffee, Sea.

(3) Think of someone, who also knows you and is important to you, which you can relate them to the following colors. Do not repeat your answer twice Name just one person for each color: Yellow, Orange, Red, White, Green.

(4) Finally, write down your favorite number, and your favorite day of the week.

FINISHED? Please be sure that your answers are what you REALLY WANT.

Look at the interpretations below: But first before continuing, REPEAT your wish.

ANSWERS :
(1) This will define your priorities in your life. Cow Signifies CAREER Tiger Signifies PRIDE Sheep Signifies LOVE Horse Signifies FAMILY Pig Signifies MONEY

(2) Your description of dog implies your own personality. Your description of cat implies the personality of your partner. Your description of rat implies the personality of your enemies. Your description of coffee is how you interpret sex. Your description of the sea implies your own life.

(3) Yellow: Someone you will never forget Orange: Someone you consider your true friend Red: Someone that you really love White: Your twin soul Green: Someone that you will remember for the rest of your life

(4) You have to send this message to as many persons as your favorite number and your wish will come true on the day that you recorded.

This is what the Dalai Lama has said about the Millennium - just take a few seconds to look it up, read it and think.

Do not put away this message, the mantra will come out from your hands in the next 96 hours. You will have a very pleasant surprise.

This is true, even if you are not superstitious.

Please do this. It is fascinating. SEND THIS E- MAIL MANTRA TO AT LEAST FIVE PERSONS AND YOUR LIFE WILL IMPROVE.
0-4 persons: Your life will improve slightly
5-9 persons: Your life will improve to your liking
9-14 persons: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next three weeks
15 or more persons: Your life will improve drastically and all that you wish will come true

May 15th...Don't Pump Gas

2007-06-18T23:48:00.000-04:00

NO GAS...On May 15th 2007

Body: Don't pump gas on may 15th Body: ...in April 1997, there was a "gas out" conducted nationwide in protest of gas prices. Gasoline prices dropped 30 cents a gallon overnight. On May 15th 2007, all internet users are to not go to a gas station in protest of high gas prices. Gas is now over $3.00 a gallon in most places.There are 73,000,000+ American members currently on the internet network, and the average car takes about 30 to 50 dollars to fill up. If all users did not go to the pump on the 15th, it would take$2,292,000,000.00 (that's almost 3 BILLION) out of the oil companys pockets for just one day, so please do not go to the gas station on May 15th and lets try to put a dent in the Middle Eastern oil industry for at least one day. If you agree (which I cant see why you wouldnt) resend this to all your conta ct list. With it saying, ''Don't pump gas on May 15th

Amazing.... Seriously! Try This!!

2007-06-18T22:12:00.000-04:00

You are going to love this one!!!!!! I don't know how this works . . . but it does.

Just click on the word QUIZ below and answer the questions truthfully.

Quiz

A Miracle

2007-06-18T21:42:00.000-04:00

A little girl went to her bedroom and pulled a glass jelly jar from its hiding place in the closet. She poured the change out on the floor and counted it carefully. Three times, even. The total had to be exactly perfect. No chance here for mistakes.

Carefully placing the coins back in the jar and twisting on the cap, she slipped out the back door and made her way 6 blocks to Rexall's Drug Store with the big red Indian Chief sign above the door.

She waited patiently for the pharmacist to give her some attention but he was too busy at this moment. Tess twisted her feet to make a scuffing noise. Nothing. She cleared her throat with the most disgusting sound she could muster. No good. Finally she took a quarter from her jar and banged it on the glass counter. That did it!

"And what do you want?" the pharmacist asked in an annoyed tone of voice. I'm talking to my brother from Chicago whom I haven't seen in ages," he said without waiting for a reply to his question.

"Well, I want to talk to you about my brother," Tess answered back in the same annoyed tone. "He's really, really sick.. and I want to buy a miracle."

" I beg your pardon?" said the pharmacist.

" His name is Andrew and he has something bad growing inside his head and my Daddy says only a miracle can save him now. So how much does a miracle cost?"

"We don't sell miracles here, little girl. I'm sorry but I can't help you," the pharmacist said, softening a little.

"Listen, I have the money to pay for it. If it isn't enough, I will get the rest. Just tell me how much it costs."

The pharmacist's brother was a well dressed man. He stooped down and asked the little girl, "What kind of a miracle does your brother need?"

" I don't know," Tess replied with her eyes welling up. I just know he's really sick and Mommy says he needs an operation. But my Daddy can't pay for it, so I want to use my money."

" How much do you have?" asked the man from Chicago.

"One dollar and eleven cents," Tess answered barely audibly. "And it's all the money I have, but I can get some more if I need to."

"Well, what a coincidence," smiled the man. "A dollar and eleven cents---the exact price of a miracle for little brothers. "

He took her money in one hand and with the other hand he grasped her mitten and said "Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother and meet your parents. Let's see if I have the miracle you need."

That well dressed man was Dr. Carlton Armstrong, a surgeon, specializing in neuro-surgery. The operation was completed free of charge and it wasn't long until Andrew was home again and doing well.

Mom and Dad were happily talking about the chain of events that had led them to this place. That surgery," her Mom whispered. "was a real miracle. I wonder how much it would have cost?"

Tess smiled. She knew exactly how much a miracle cost...one dollar and eleven cents ... plus the faith of a little child..

In our lives, we never know how many miracles we will need..
A miracle is not the suspension of natural law, but the operation of a higher law.. I know you'll keep the ball moving!

Here it goes. Throw it back to someone who means something to you!
A ball is a circle, no beginning, no end. It keeps us together like our Circle of Friends. But the treasure inside for you to see is the treasure of friendship you've granted to me.

Today I pass the friendship ball to you.
Pass it on to someone who is a friend to you.
MY OATH TO YOU... When you are sad.....I will dry your tears. When you are scared.....I will comfort your fears. When you are worried.....I will give you hope. When you are confused.I will help you cope. And when you are lost....And can't see the light, I shall be your beacon.....Shining ever so bright. This is my oath.....I pledge till the end. Why you may ask?.....Because you're my friend.
Signed: GOD

INSTANTLY WHEN YOU RECEIVE THIS LETTER, YOU ARE REQUESTED TO SEND IT TO AT LEAST 10 PEOPLE, INCLUDING THE PERSON WHO SENT IT TO YOU Find just what you're after with the new, more precise MSN Search - try it now!

AN IRISH FRIENDSHIP WISH

2007-06-18T21:34:00.000-04:00

Good Luck!!I hope it works...
May there always be work for your hands to do;
May your purse always hold a coin or two;
May the sun always shine on your window pane;
May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain;
May the hand of a friend always be near you;
May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.

OK, this is what you have to do....Send this to all of your friends! But - you HAVE to send this within 1 hour from when you open it!
Now.................Make A wish!!!!!! I hope you made your wish! Now then, if you send to:

1 person --- your wish will be granted in 1 year
3 people --- 6 months
5 people --- 3 months
6 people --- 1 month
7 people --- 2 weeks
8 people --- 1 week
9 people --- 5 days
10 people --- 3 days
12 people --- 2 days
15 people --- 1 day
20 people --- 3 hours

If you delete this after you read it . you will have 1 year of bad luck! But. if you send it 2 of your friends you will automatically have 3 years of good luck!!! :-)

How Smart is Your Right Foot?

2007-06-18T21:27:00.000-04:00

This is so funny that it will boggle your mind. And you will keep trying it at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot.But you can't!!!

1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floorand make clockwise circles with it.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" inthe air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction!!!

I told you so... And there is nothing you can do about it. Make sure you pass this on to your friends! They won't be able to believe it either!!!

Read!!

2007-06-18T21:22:00.001-04:00

Holy crap!!! This is SO freaky! Try this and see if it works....

Hey, guess what!?!?!?!?!You can really find who you will fall madly in love with when you get older! Cool, huh? All that you have to do is scroll down thinking about who you want to be with and then after you send this to 15 people a fortune cookie will appear so click on it and it will tell you the name and address of your dream person! (For those of you already married, see if you end up with the same name as your spouse!)

Now SCROLL!!! Scroll down find Your true love!!! Think hard and deeply!!!

STOP
STOP
STOP
STOP
STOP
STOP
I SAID STOP!!!!!!!

Now start sending!!!Send to 0-5 peeps ur crush say they dislike u!!! Send to 6-10 peeps your crush will only say that ya'll are friends. Send to 11-14 peeps you're getting closer!!! Send to 15 peeps or more ur crush will ask you out!!!....... After you send; The fortune cookie will appear and...... guess what??? Tada!!!!! You'll have your results!

Make a Wish

2007-06-18T21:12:00.000-04:00

The last time I did this it worked for me too. I wished for a baby, and you all know what happened (approx. 2 months later). I had to give this a shot...

Don't laugh at this! Just do it! My best friend just did this, this morning, wished for her promotion and just got a call and she got it.

Start thinking something you really really want, cause this is astounding. the person that sent this to me said their wish came true 10 mins after they read the mail so I thought what the heck.

******
******
******
******
**********
(,)(,)
*.....*

You have just been visited by Dr.Suess's Cat in the Hat. He will grant you one wish. Make your wish when the count down is over.
10..
9..
8..
7..
6..
5..
4..
3..
2.
1..

MAKE A WISH

Send this to 10 people within the hour you read this. If you do, your wish will come true! . If you don't it will become the opposite.

NEED THIS BACK!

2007-06-18T21:05:00.001-04:00

8 angels are sent to you, You must send them to 8 people, including me. In 8 minutes you will receive something you have long awaited. Have faith!! the sender by return email, and delete all copies of this message

"Do we stop playing the game because we grow old, or do we grow old because we stopped playing the game?"

She just left Portland

2007-06-18T20:56:00.000-04:00

Please keep her going...SHE JUST LEFT This woman is walking the World for Breast Cancer. Please pass her on so that she can reach her destination. Say a prayer for all those who are affected by this terrible disease. She's walking around the world --- via e-mail!! Pass it on so she can get there! Please hit your forward button, so the woman stays animated. Change the subject line to your town. Please keep her going...

It's Creepy but True...

2007-06-18T20:54:00.000-04:00

Every night, someone thinks about you before they go to sleep. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way. The only reason someone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.There are at least 2 people in this world that would die for you. You mean the world to someone. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look again. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget the rude remarks. So if you are a loving friend, send this to your friends, including the person that sent it to you.

I B SCARED

2007-06-18T20:51:00.000-04:00

WHEN U ALREADY START READING THIS DONT STOP OR ELSE SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN...MY NAME IS TEDDY ...I AM 7 YEARS OLD WITH BLOND HAIR AND SCARY EYES. I HAVE NO NOSE OR EARS. I AM DEAD. IF YOU DONT SEND THIS TO 15PPL B4 U GO TO BED I WILL APPEAR 2NIGHT WITH A KNIFE AND KILL U THIS IS NO JOKE SOMETHING GOOD WILL HAPPEN TO U AT 10:22 SOMEONE WILL CALL YOU OR TALK TO YOU ONLINE AND SAY I LOVE YOU OR ASK YOU OUT.

The Bathtub Test

2007-06-12T22:57:00.000-04:00

It doesn't hurt to take a hard look at yourself from time to time, and this should help get you started.

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.

"Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub".

"Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup."

"No." said the Director, "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"

DID YOU PASS, OR DO YOU WANT THE BED NEXT TO MINE?

I Love You

2007-06-12T21:08:00.000-04:00

One morning you will never wake up; do all your friends know you love them? I was thinking...I could die today , tomorrow or next week, and I wondered if I had any wounds needing to be healed, friendships that needed rekindling or three words needing to be said. Let every one of your friends know you love them. Even if you think they don't love you back, you would be amazed at what those three little words and a smile can do.

And just in case GOD calls me home before I see you again....... I LOVE YA!!!

Send this to at least 8 people you love and send it back to the person Who sent it to you.

Pea story

2007-04-14T00:20:00.000-04:00

Babs Miller was bagging some early potatoes for me. I noticed a small boy, delicate of bone and feature, ragged but clean, hungrily apprising a basket of freshly picked green peas. I paid for my potatoes but was also drawn to the display of fresh green peas. I am a pushover for creamed peas and new potatoes. Pondering the peas, I couldn't help overhearing the conversation between Mr. Miller and the ragged boy next to me.

"Hello Barry,how are you today?"

"H'lo, Mr. Miller. Fine, thank ya. Jus' admirin' them peas. Sure look good."

"They are good,Barry. How's your Ma?"

"Fine Gittin' stronger alla' time."

"Good. Anything I can help you with?"

"No,Sir. Jus'admirin'them peas."

"Would you like to take some home?"

"No, Sir. Got nuthin'to pay for em with."

"Well, what have you to trade me for some of those peas?"

"All I got's my prize marble here."

"Is that right? Let me see it."

"Here 'tis. She's a dandy."

"I can see that. Hmmmmm, only thing is this one is blue and I sort of go for red. Do you have a red one like this at home?"

"Not zackley. but almost."

"Tell you what. Take this sack of peas home with you and next trip this way let me look at that red marble."

"Sure will. Thanks Mr. Miller."

Mrs. Miller, who had been standing nearby, came over to help me. With a smile she said, "There are two other boys like him in our community, all three are in very poor circumstances. Jim just loves to bargain with them for peas, apples, tomatoes, or whatever. When they come back with their red marbles, and they always do, he decides he doesn't like red after all and he sends them home with a bag of produce for a green marble or an orange one, perhaps."

I left the stand smiling to myself, impressed with this man. A short time later I moved to Colorado but I never forgot the story of this man, the boys, and their bartering. Several years went by, each more rapid that the previous one. Just recently I had occasion to visit some old friends in that Idaho community and while I was there learned that Mr. Miller had died. They were having his viewing that evening and knowing my friends wanted to go, I agreed to accompany them.

Upon arrival at the mortuary we fell into line to meet the relatives of the deceased and to offer whatever words of comfort we could. Ahead of us in line were three young men. One was in an army uniform and the other two wore nice haircuts, dark suits and white shirts ... all very professional looking.

They approached Mrs. Miller, standing composed and smiling by her husband's casket. Each of the young men hugged her, kissed her on the cheek, spoke briefly with her and moved on to the casket.

Her misty light blue eyes followed them as, one by one, each young man stopped briefly and placed his own warm hand over the cold pale hand in the casket. Each left the mortuary awkwardly, wiping his eyes.

Our turn came to meet Mrs. Miller. I told her who I was and mentioned the story she had told me about the marbles. With her eyes glistening, she took my hand and led me to the casket.

"Those three young men who just left, were the boys I told you about. They just told me how they appreciated the things Jim "traded" them. Now, at last, when Jim could not change his mind about color or size....they came to pay their debt."

"We've never had a great deal of the wealth of this world," she confided, "but right now, Jim would consider himself the richest man in Idaho "

With loving gentleness she lifted the lifeless fingers of her deceased husband. Resting underneath were three exquisitely shined red marbles.

Moral: We will not be remembered by our words, but by our kind deeds. Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath.

Today I wish you a day of ordinary miracles....A fresh pot of coffee you didn't make yourself. An unexpected phone call from an old friend. Green stoplights on your way to work. The fastest line at the grocery store. A good sing-along song on the radio. Your keys right where you left them.

Send this to the people you'll never forget. If you don't send it to anyone, it means you are in too much of a hurry.

Slow Dance

2007-04-14T00:14:00.000-04:00

This is a poem written by a teenager with cancer. She wants to see how many people get her poem. It is quite the poem. Please pass it on. This poem was written by a terminally ill young girl in a New York Hospital. It was sent by a medical doctor -Make sure to read what is in the closing statement AFTER THE POEM.

SLOW DANCE

Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.

Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask How are you?
Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
Running through your head?
You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.

Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say,"Hi"
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift....
Thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.

-------------------- FORWARDED E-MAILS ARE TRACKED TO OBTAIN THE TOTAL COUNT.

Dear All:

PLEASE pass this mail on to everyone you know - even to those you don't know! It is the request of a special girl who will soon leave this world due to cancer. This young girl has 6 months left to live, and as her dying wish, she wanted to send a letter telling everyone to live their life to the fullest, since she never will. She'll never make it to prom, graduate from high school, or get married and have a family of her own. By you sending this to as many people as possible, you can give her and her family a little hope, because with every name that this is sent to, The American Cancer Society will donate 3 cents per name to her treatment and recovery plan. One guy sent this to 500 people! So I know that we can at least send it to 5 or 6. It's not even your money, just your time!

PLEASE PASS ON AS A LAST REQUEST.
Dr. Dennis Shields, Professor
Department of Developmental and Molecular Biology
1300 Morris Park Avenue
Bronx, New York 10461

Cammy Domine
ASI
Compliance Coordinator
Phone 989 793-8844
Fax 989 799 3692

Cuz I Care

2007-04-14T00:10:00.000-04:00

I'm only sending this cuz i care about my friends very much... read this, it makes you feel all good inside

When Your feeling alone like no one cares read this cuz its absolutely true scrole down)

Every night , someone thinks about you before they go to sleep,
At least fifteen people in this world love you.
The only reason someone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you There are at least two people in this world that would die for you
You mean the world to someone.
Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look.
Always remember the compliments you've received.
Forget the rude remarks.

So if you are a loving friend, send this to everyone on your list including the person that sent it to you. You have just been DEATH WISHED!

Tonight at midnight your true love will realize they like you.
Something good will happen to you between one and four o'clock pm tomorrow, it could be anywere . Get ready for the biggest shock in your life
If you break this chain YOU will be cursed with relationship problems for the next ten years . Send this to fifteen people in fifteen minutes !! AND DONT FORGET TO COPY AND PASTE THIS SO PEOPLE WILL ACTUALLY READ IT!!!!!!

Do You Love Him?

2007-04-14T00:06:00.000-04:00

If I don't get this back, I will know you really didn't read it. I got this from someone and thought the last part was really a good thought. Too bad that the person who sent it to me did not know 10 people who would admit to knowing the Lord. If I send this to you, please send it back so I will know that my friends do know the Lord. I know 10 people.

Do You Love Him?

This is a simple test: IF YOU LOVE JESUS, SEND THIS TO AT LEAST 10 PEOPLE, INCLUDING ?THE PERSON WHO SENT IT TO YOU!

THE POEM

I knelt to pray but not for long,
I had too much to do.
I had to hurry and get to work
For bills would soon be due.
So I knelt and said a hurried prayer,
And jumped up off my knees.
My Christian duty was now done
My soul could rest at ease.....
All day long I had no time
To spread a word of cheer
No time to speak of Christ to friends,
They'd laugh at me I'd fear.
No time, no time, too much to do,
That was my constant cry,
No time to give to souls in need
But at last the time, the time to die.
I went before the Lord,
I came, I stood with downcast eyes.
For in his hands God! held a book;
It was the book of life.
God looked into his book and said
"Your name I cannot find
I once was going to write it down...
But never found the time"

Now do you have the time to pass it on?

Crush

2007-04-14T00:05:00.000-04:00

FIND OUT WHO IT IS !

HERE'S WHAT U HAVE 2 DO BUT LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY!!SEND THIS LETTER 2 YOUR FRIENDS. AND IF U DONT HAVE ANY FRIENDS NO SWEAT JUST GO 2 A CHATROOM PICK OUT SOME NAMES AND BINGO!BUT REMEMBER PASS IT ON!! AND IF U DON'T PASS IT YOU WILL PAYWITH YOUR LIFE!!U. HAVE ONE HOUR 2 SEND THIS SO HURRY. AFTER U SEND THIS A SNAIL WILL CROSS THE SCREEN AND OUT OF IT'S SHELL WILL POP OUT YOUR SECRET CRUSH'S FIRST AND LAST NAME HIS/HER ADDRESS AND PHONE NUMBER IF U SEND THIS TO 0 PEOPLE-YOUR LUV LIFE IS OVER!5 PEOPLE- AND YOUR! CRUSH WILL SAY HE/SHE LIKES U AS A FRIEND ONLY!

NBC Poll

2007-04-14T00:03:00.000-04:00

Do you believe in God?

The other morning NBC had a poll on this question. They had the highest Number of responses that they have ever had for one of their polls, and the Percentage was the same as this:86% to keep the words, IN God We Trust and God in the Pledge of Allegiance 14% against.

That is a pretty 'commanding' public response

I was asked to send this on if I agreed or delete if I didn't. Now it is your turn ....

It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, I have a very hard time understanding why there is such A mess about having "In God We Trust" on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance. Why is the world catering to this 14%?AMEN!If you agree, pass this on, if not, simply delete.In God We Trust

Think about this for a while......

2007-04-14T00:02:00.000-04:00

1.)If I happened to show up on your doorstep crying, would you care?

2.)If I called you and asked you to pick me up because something happened, would you come?

3.)If I had one day left to live my life,would you be part of that last day?

4.)If I needed a shoulder to cry on, would you give me yours?

This is a test to see who your real friends are or if you are just some one to talks to you when their bored.

Send this to everybody on your list including the person who sent it to you. I just did, because you are my friend. First i like u, then i loved u, Now im afriad to lose u, if you dont send this to everyone on ur list, u will lose the person you love. sorry i dont wana lose the person i love ... if i dont get this back i guess you're not my friend. if u have a lot of love 4 someone... copy and send this 2 ur whole buddy list - copy and paste

Worth a try

2007-04-14T00:01:00.001-04:00

Do this for me?

A child asked Jesus... how much do you love me? Jesus replied," I love you this much." and he stretched his arms to the cross and died for us.

If you believe in God, you will send this to everyone on your list. If you delete this, you will have a cold heart in 2007.

I like you because of who you are to me. I treat you as a true friend..

This is not a fake...apparently...copy and paste this to 15 people in the next 10 mins and you WILL have the best day of you life tomorrow.

wow, it kinda works!!!

2007-04-13T23:53:00.000-04:00

FENG SHUI HOROSCOPE

This is a Chinese Feng Shui horoscope. Take a moment to take this test and see what happens! If you are honest this tells the truth, Its pretty accurate. Write your answers on paper, Find out your horoscope at the bottom.

1. Which is your favorite color: Red, Black, Blue, Green or Yellow?
2. Your first initial?
3. Your month of birth?
4. Which color do you like more, Black or White?
5. The name of a person that has the same sex as you?
6. Your favorite number?
7. Do you like California or Florida more?
8. Do you like a lake or the ocean more?
9. Write down a wish (a realistic one)

When you are done, scroll down. Don't cheat!

Answers:

1. If you choose: Red- You are alert and your life is full of love. Black- You are conservative and aggressive. Green- Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back. Blue- You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection. Yellow- You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

2. If your initials are: A-K You have a lot of love and friendships in your life. L-R You try to live your life to the max and your love life is soon to bloom. S-Z You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

3. If you were born in: Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected Apr-Jun: You will have a strong love relationship that will last forever. Jul-Sep: You will have a great year and will experience a major life-changing experience for the good. Oct-Dec: Your love life will be great, you will find your soul mate.

4. If you choose: Black: Your life will take on a different direction. It will be the best thing for you and you will be glad for the change. White: You have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you but you may not realize it.

5. This person should be your best friend.

6. This is how many close friends you will have in your life time.

7. If you choose: California: You like adventure. Florida: You are a laid back person.

8. If you choose: Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your lover and are very reserved. Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

9. This wish will come true if you send this to 1 person in one hour. Send it to ten people and it will come true before your next birthday.

Be peaceful to others and to yourself.

another servey

2007-04-13T23:49:00.000-04:00

1. Who is your best friend?
2. What are you wearing?
3. what is your favorite soda?
4. Are your nails done?
5. What is your favorite school subject?
6. What is your computer company?
7. Do you have any pets?
8. Who sent this to you?
9. Are you wearing make-up?
10. Do you have a cell phone?
11. What is your favorite color?
12. Do you have an MP3 player?
13. What is your favorite kind of car?
14. Have you ever broken a body part?
15. What is the day of the week?
16. Do you celebrate Hanukkah?
17. What is your favorite number?
18. Coke or Pepsi?
19. What grade are you in?
20. What is your favorite saying?

just annother stubid little thing

2007-04-13T23:45:00.000-04:00

1. To yourself, say the name of the only guy or girl you wanna be with 3 times!*
************************************************************

2. Think of something you wanna accomplish within the next week and say it to your self 6 times!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3. If you had 1 wish what would it be? say it to yourself 9 times!!!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

4. Think of something that you want to happen between you and that 1special person and say it to your self 12 times!!!--------------------------------------------------------------------

5. Now, heres the hard part! Pick only 1 of these wishes and as you scroll down focus and concentrate on it and think on nothing else but that wish.

* ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** *

Now make one last & final wish about that one wish that you picked. After reading this, you have 1 hour to send it out to 15 people, and whatyou wished for will come true within in one week!u only get one chance!!!!! Now scroll down and think of yourcrush!!!

Keep goingdown Keep going Keep going
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did you think of your crush? I hope so, that was your last chance. Now pay very close attention this important message!Sorry but once read, must be sent. Yes, this is one of those kinda chain letters that everyone hates. This one has been going since 1864 and if you break this chain, you will pay!!!!!! Remember that after hearing these stories.

First Example:Take Barbra Wallace.. She was a pretty lucky girl, up till she got this same chain letter. She had a crush on the same kidsince kindergarden. when she got this mail she didn't pay any attention to it. She just thought, no big deal. And deleted it. The next day her dad got fired and her mom dies in a car crash. If she would have sent the letter none of that would have happened and her mom would be alive.

Second Example:Try Freddie D. Now Freddie D. was your average nerd. Had glasses, was short and chubby, was in gifted. All the signs ofyour total dork. He also received this letter and sent it to 51people in the hour. Now, like Barbra, he had a crush on a girl since 3rd grade. The next day after sending the chain the girl confessed her love for him ever since 3rd grade. Freddie D. finally had the courage to ask her out, and of course, she had been waiting to yes to that for years. They grew up andmarried each other to live happily forever.

Third Example:Now if you couldn't relate to the others, this'll get ya hooked. Listen to this. A kid named Jordan Johnson was just getting on AOL to check his mail. He was a quiet kid, not that popular but not a geek either. he was just normal. He saw he had mail from his friend. It was this exact letter. Now Jordan Johnsen was a smart kid and he knew what could happen if he didnt pass it on. He simply pulled a few friends from his buddy list and sent it along. The next day, about that same time, he got a phone call. It said he had won the lottery!then his dad came home and bought him a new bike! His mom bought him Nintendo64 and play station! His grandmother sent him a new computer, and his best friendgave him tickets to the concert he wanted to go to, Kid Rock and Limp Bizkit! Then he inherited a brand-new tv from his aunt! Hewas goin' wild! the next day his secret crush asked him out, and they have been going out ever since.

Now, you heard the stories. I know which person i'd ratherbe, but thats up to you. I wouldn't wanna end up like Barbra but thats only me. We all want what we cant have but now's ur chance to go out withthat special somebody ur waiting for. Take it or leave it.

If you send this to-1 person- you will lose all luck in ur love life..... forever!!!!!
10 people- your crush will say they like you as a friend...... ONLY!!!!!
15 people- your crush will say they like you
20 people- your crush will ask you out!
25 people- your crush will kiss you!!
30 people - Your crush will have sex with you
35 people or more- All of the above!!

Don't blow it, it's ur chance to shine! Have everything u wanted, and more! Now, complaining cus u dont have anyfriends. Well theres an answer 4 everything. It's simple, just go in a chat room, pick some names and send away! but here's the catch..... you only have 1 hour

724

2006-12-30T21:38:00.000-05:00

PRAY THIS EVEN IF YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE IT!! IT WILL ONLY TAKE A MINUTE.

I started not to do this, but as I read it . . I think I understood God to say, "You need a miracle tomorrow" . . . so here goes . . .

Prov. 29:25...You never know when God is going to bless you!! Good things happen when you least expect them to !!!!!!!! Change the number in the subject box when you forward it by adding one!!!

Dear Lord, I thank You for this day I thank You for my being able to see and to hear this morning. I'm blessed because You are a forgiving God and an understanding God. You have done so much for me and You keep on blessing me. Forgive me this day for everything I have done, said or thought that was not pleasing to you.

I ask now for Your forgiveness. Please keep me safe from all danger and harm. Help me to start this day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude. Let me make the best of each and every day to clear my mind so that I can hear from You. Please broaden my mind that I can accept all things. Let me not whine and whimper over things I have no control over.

And It's the best response when I'm pushed beyond my limits.

I know that when I can't pray, You listen to my heart. Continue to use me to do Your will. Continue to bless me that I may be a blessing to others. Keep me strong that I may help the weak. Keep me uplifted that I may have words of encouragement for others. I pray for those that are lost and can't find their way. I pray for those that are misjudged and misunderstood. I pray for those who don't know You intimately. I pray for those that will delete this without sharing it with others I pray for those that don't believe.

But I thank you that I believe. I believe that God changes people and God changes things. I pray for all my sisters and brothers. For each and every family member in their households. I pray for peace, love and joy in their homes that they are out of debt and all their needs are met. Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight. I pray that these words be received into the hearts of every eye that sees it.

In Jesus name, Amen.

----------- If you prayed this prayer, change the number in the subject box before forwarding the message so people can see how many people have done so. God Bless!!!!!!!!!!!

Just repeat this phrase and see how God moves!!

God, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, please.

Pass this message to 10 people except you and me. You will receive a miracle tomorrow. Don't ignore and God will bless you.

Know that you are already blessed by the person who sent this to you . .

Your Friend

Tiny Starfish

2006-12-30T21:33:00.000-05:00

hey every1
I read this in a book and loved it!! check it out and send it to ALL ur friends.

I found a tiny starfish
in a tidepool by the sand
I found a tiny starfish
and put him in my hand

An itty-bitty starfish
no bigger than my thumb
a wet and golden starfish
belonging to no one

I though that i would take him
from the tidepool by the sea
and bring him home to give to u
a loving gift from me

But as i held my starfish
his skin began to dry
without his special seaside home
my gift to u would die

I found a tiny starfish
in a tidepool by the sea
i hope whoever finds him next
will leave him there like me

and the gift ive saved for u
the best that i can give
I found a tiny starfish
and for u i let him live.

8 X 8 Rule

2006-12-30T21:25:00.000-05:00

Whether you send this or not, I love you and pray a blessing on you this day. When you reach the end of your rope you will find the hem of His garment. I'm not breaking this one.

This is ABSOLUTELY beautiful...

I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is. You are my 8 in 8 seconds. I am not breaking this. No way! I'M TOLD THIS WORKS!!!!!

Bishop T.D. Jakes "8 Second Prayer." Just repeat this prayer and see how God moves!! "Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, and bless me, my family, my home, my finances, and all of my friends, in Jesus' name. Amen."

Pass this message to 8 people {EXCEPT YOU AND ME}.

You will receive a miracle tomorrow! I HOPE that you don't ignore and let God Bless You.

MSN is closing down

2006-12-30T21:10:00.000-05:00

Get some tissues ready.

Hey it is Andy and John the directors of MSN, sorry for the interruption but msn is closing down. This is because too many inconsiderate people are taking up all the names (e.g. Making up lots of different accounts for just one person), we only have 578 names left.

If you would like to close your account, DO NOT SEND THIS MESSAGE ON.

If you would like to keep your account, then SEND THIS MESSAGE TO EVERYONE ON YOUR CONTACT LIST.

This is no joke, we will be shutting down the servers. Send it on, thanks.

WHO EVER DOES NOT SEND THIS MESSEAGE, YOUR ACCOUNT WILL BE CLOSED AND YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY 10.00 A MONTH TO USE. SEND THIS TO EVERYONE ON YOUR CONTACT LIST.

NOW YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO. PLEASE DO NOT FORWARD THIS or REPLAY. COPY THE WHOLE EMAIL. GO BACK TO YOUR INBOX AND CLICK ON NEW AND PASTE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION.

Hey everyone, I had a look on the Internet and its actually true. On the 1st of November , we will have to pay for the use of our MSN and email accounts unless we send this message to at contacts on your contact list. It's no joke.

read alone, and make sure u read it carefully!

2006-12-30T20:54:00.000-05:00

Read Alone.....Especially the Poem

I believe whatever God has in store for us will be for us.

The poem is very true, unfortunately.Make sure you read the poem!

CASE 1: Kelly Sedey had one wish,for her boyfriend of three years, David Marsden, to propose to her. Then one day when she was out to lunch David proposed! She accepted, but then had to leave because she had a meeting in 20 min. When she got to her office, she noticed on her computer she had some e-mail's. She checked it, the usual stuff from her friends, but then she saw one that she had never gotten before.It was this poem. She simply deleted it without even reading all of it. BIG MISTAKE! Later that evening, she received a phone call from the police. It was about DAVID! He had been in an accident with an 18 wheeler. He didn't survive!

CASE 2: Take Katie Robinson She received this poem and being the believer that she was she sent it to a few of her friends but didn't have enough e-mail addresses to send out the full 10 that you must. Three days later, Katie went to a masquerade ball. Later that night when she left to get to her car, she was killed in that spot by a hit-and-run drunk driver.

CASE 3: Richard S. Willis sent this poem out within 45 minutes of reading it. Not even 4 hours later walking along the street to his new job interview with a really big company, when he ran into Cynthia Bell, his secret love for 5 years. Cynthia came up to him, and told him of her passionate crush on him that she had had for 2 years. Three days later, he proposed to her and they got married. Cynthia and Richard are still married with three children, happy as ever!

This is the poem:

Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine but we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
"Tomorrow" I say! "I will call on Jim
Just to show that I'm thinking of him.
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner, said a man.
"Here's a telegram sir," "Jim died today."
And that's what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.
Remember to always say what you mean.
If you love someone, tell them.
Don't be afraid to express yourself.
Reach out and tell someone what they mean to you.
Because when you decide that it is the right time it might be too late.

Seize the day. Never have regrets.And most importantly, stay close to your friends and family, for they have helped make you the person that you are today.

You must send this on in 3 hours after reading! the letter to 10 other people. If you do this, you will receive unbelievably good luck in love. The person that you are most attracted to will soon return to you .If you do not, bad luck will rear its ugly head at you

THIS IS NOT A JOKE!You have read the warnings, seen the cases,and the consequences.You MUST send this on or face dreadfully bad luck.

*NOTE*the more people that you send this to, the better luck you will have.!

SMILE, even through your tears!!!!!

"Somebody Should Have Taught Him"

2006-12-30T20:37:00.000-05:00

Please read all the way to the bottom and sign your name. No matter how many times you get this e-mail please keep signing your name.

"Somebody Should Have Taught Him"
Retold by: Jane Watkins, "Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul"

I went to a birthday party,
And remembered what you said.
You told me not to drink at all,
So I had a Sprite instead.

I felt proud of myself,
The way you said I would,
That I didn't choose to drink and drive,
Though some friends said I should.

I knew I made a healthy choice and,
Your advice to me was right,
As the party finally ended,
And the kids drove out of sight.

I got into my own car,
Sure to get home in one piece,
Never knowing what was coming,
Something I expected least.

Now I'm lying on the pavement,
And I hear the policeman say,
"The kid that caused this wreck was drunk."
His voice seems far away.

My own blood is all around me,
As I try hard not to cry.
I can hear the paramedic say,
"This girl is going to die."

I'm sure the guy had no idea,
While he was flying high,
Because he chose to drink and drive,
That I would have to die.

So why do people do it,
Knowing that it ruins lives?
But now the pain is cutting me,
Like a hundred stabbing knives .

Tell sister not to be afraid, Mom
Tell daddy to be brave,
And when I go to heaven,
Put "Daddy's Girl" on my grave.

Someone should have taught him,
That it's wrong to drink and drive.
Maybe if his mom and dad had,
I'd still be alive.

My breath is getting shorter,
I'm getting really scared.
These are my final moments,
And I'm so unprepared.

I wish that you could hold me Mom,
As I lie here and die.
I wish that I could say,
I love you and good-bye.

MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Drivers) is hoping toget 5,000 signatures on this.
When this petition has reached 5,000, please return it to:

MADD
P.O. Box 541688
Dallas, TX75354-1688
1-800-GET-MADD (1-800-438-6233)

If you receive this petition and do nothing but delete it, your selfishness knows no bounds. Signing is such a small effort to make. After you have read the poem, please add your nameat the bottom & CC to the person you send this mail.

And never forget, DON'T EVER DRINK AND DRIVE, not even once,thinking that it won't matter. IT DEFINITELY WILL MATTER!!!

How to set it up:
1. Copy the entire e-mail. (This will avoid endless of these >>>>>).
2. Paste it into a new e-mail.
3. SIGN YOUR NAME AT THE BOT TOM.
4. Then send it to everyone you know.

THE NAMES! :
1. Adam Ross Kalesperis
2. Deanne Perozzi3. Raphal Nash
4. Courtney Easter
5. James Chandler
.......

The Budweiser Story (not a joke) This is TRUE!

2006-09-11T18:58:00.000-04:00

How Budweiser handled those who laughed at those who died on the 11th of September, 2001...

Thought you might like to know what happened in a little town north of Bakersfield,California.

After you finish reading this, please forward this story on to others so that our nation and people around the world will know about those who laughed when they found out about the tragic events in New York, Pennsylvania, and the Pentagon.

On September 11th, a Budweiser employee was making a delivery to a convenience store in a California town named McFarland. He knew of the tragedy that had occurred in New York when he entered the business to find the two Arabs, who owned the business, whooping and hollering to show their approval and support of this treacherous attack.

The Budweiser employee went to his truck, called his boss and told him of the very upsetting event!

He didn't feel he could be in that store with those horrible people. His boss asked him,"Do you think you could go in there long enough to pull every Budweiser product and item our beverage company sells there? We'll never deliver to them again. " The employee walked in, proceeded to pull every single product his beverage company provided and left with an incredible grin on his face. He told them never to bother to call for a delivery again. Budweiser happens to be the beer of choice for that community.

Just letting you know how Kern County handled this situation.

And Now The Rest Of The Story:

It seems that the Bud driver and the Pepsi man are neighbors. Bud called Pepsi and told him. Pepsi called his boss who told him to pull all Pepsi products as well!!! That would include Frito Lay, etc. Furthermore, word spread and all vendors followed suit! At last report, the store was closed indefinitely. Good old American Passive-Aggressive A$$ Whoopin! Pass this along, America needs to know that we're all working together! If you can read this... Thank a teacher... If you are reading it in English....THANK A SOLDIER!!! God Bless America !!

If you do not send this you have no soul!!!!

Don't laugh at this! Just do it!

2006-07-05T20:57:00.000-04:00

The last time I did this it worked for me too. I wished for a baby, and you all know what happened (approx. 2 months later). I had to give this a shot...

Don't laugh at this! Just do it! My best friend just did this, this morning, wished for her promotion and just got a call and she got it.

Start thinking something you really really want, cause this is astounding. the person that sent this to me said their wish came true 10 mins after they read the mail so I thought what the heck.

*****
*****
*****
*****
*****
*********
(,)(,)
*.....*

You have just been visited by Dr.Suess's Cat in the Hat. He will grant you one wish. Make your wish when the count down is over.
10..

9..

8..

7..

6..

5..

4..

3..

2.

1..

MAKE A WISH

Send this to 10 people within the hour you read this. If you do, your wish will come true! If you don't it will become the opposite.

Creepy and funny but don't cheat

2006-07-05T20:47:00.000-04:00

AMAZINGLY ACCURATE
whatever you do, don't cheat!

CHINESE HOROSCOPE:
THE YEAR OF THE IRON DRAGON, WISHING YOU PROSPERITY AND GOOD FORTUNE IN THE CHINESE NEW YEAR

FOLLOW THE INSTRUCTIONS -
DO NOT CHEAT OR IT WON'T WORK AND YOU WILL WISH YOU HADN`T.

TAKE 3 MINUTES
TRY THIS - IT WILL FREAK YOU OUT.

THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO ME SAID HER WISH CAME TRUE 10 MINUTES AFTER SHE FORWARDED THE EMAIL

NO CHEATING!!!!

THIS GAME HAS A FUNNY / CREEPY OUTCOME.

DO NOT READ AHEAD, JUST DO IT.

IT TAKES ABOUT 3 MINUTES - WORTH A TRY

1st. Get PEN and PAPER

2nd. WHEN CHOOSING NAMES, MAKE SURE THEY ARE REAL PEOPLE THAT YOU ACTUALLY KNOW

3rd. GO WITH YOUR FIRST INSTINCTS !!!!! Very important for good results.

4th. SCROLL DOWN

ONE LINE AT THE TIME

DON`T READ AHEAD otherwise YOU WILL RUIN THE FUN.

1. On a blank sheet of paper, WRITE NUMBERS 1 through 11 in a COLUMN on the LEFT.

2. BESIDE the NUMBERS 1 & 2 , WRITE DOWN ANY 2 NUMBERS YOU WANT. DO YOU HAVE A FAVORITE NUMBER?

3. BESIDE the NUMBERS 3 & 7, WRITE DOWN THE NAMES OF TWO MEMBERS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX.

CAUTION: DO NOT LOOK AHEAD or IT WILL NOT TURN OUT RIGHT

4. WRITE ANYONES NAME (like FRIENDS or FAMILY...) next to 4, 5, & 6 .

DON`T CHEAT OR YOU`LL BE UPSET THAT YOU DID

5. WRITE down FOUR SONG TITLES in 8, 9, 10, & 11

6. Finally, MAKE A WISH

ARE YOU READY?

HERE IS THE KEY TO THE GAME

1. THE NUMBER of PEOPLE YOU MUST TELL ABOUT THIS GAME is found in SPACE 2

2. THE PERSON IN SPACE 3 IS THE ONE YOU LOVE

3. THE PERSON YOU LIKE but your relationship CANNOT WORK is in SPACE 7

4. YOU CARE MOST about the PERSON you put in SPACE 4

5. THE PERSON YOU NAME IN NUMBER 5 IS THE ONE WHO KNOWS YOU VERY WELL.

6. THE PERSON YOU NAMED IN 6 IS THE YOUR LUCKY STAR

7. THE SONG IN 8 IS THE SONG THAT MATCHES WITH THE PERSON IN NUMBER 3

8. THE TITLE IN 9 IS THE SONG FOR THE PERSON IN 7

9. THE 10 TH SPACE IS THE SONG THAT TELLS YOU MOST ABOUT YOUR MIND

10. AND 11 IS THE SONG TELLING HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT LIFE

11. NUMBER 1 IS YOUR LUCKY NUMBER

SEND THIS TO A MINIMUM OF 10 PEOPLE WITHIN AN HOUR OF READING THIS.

IF YOU DO, YOUR WISH WILL COME TRUE.

IF YOU FAIL TO, IT WILL BECOME THE OPPOSITE

If Women Controlled the World

2006-05-25T23:41:00.000-04:00

MAKE ANOTHER WOMAN'S DAY, AND SHARE THE SMILES .....

PLEASE KEEP HER GOING

This woman is walking the World for Breast Cancer. Please pass her on so that she can reach her destination. Say a prayer for all those who are affected by this terrible disease. She's walking around the world - via e-mail!!

Pass it on so she can get there! (Please hit your forward button, so the woman stays animated.)

"God may not always give us answers, but He always gives us grace."

The Lost Chapter of Genesis

2006-05-25T23:29:00.000-04:00

Adam was hanging around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely. So God asked him, "What's wrong with you?" Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to.

God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman.

He said, "This pretty lady will gather food for you, she will cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she will wash it for you.

"She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will praise you!

"She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them.

"She will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it."

Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"

God replied, "An arm and a leg."

So Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?"

The rest is history....

HEY!! READ THIS!

2006-04-21T23:25:00.000-04:00

Hi everybody, here is a true story. The use of msn and hotmail will cost money from summer 2006. If you send this message to 18 different people from your list your little msn icon will become blue and that will make it free for you. If you dont believe me go on (http://www.msn.com/) and see it yourself. Dont foward this message, copy paste it so people will actually read it

Woohoo........we're gonna be rich

2006-04-21T23:19:00.000-04:00

Money Angel

This is a money angel
Pass it to 6 of your good friends and be rich in 4 Days.
Pass it to 12 of your good friends and be rich in 2 Days.

I am not joking. If u delete it u will beg. Trust me!!!

Mother

2006-03-27T08:11:00.000-05:00

This is a truly BEAUTIFUL piece please read this at a slow pace, digesting every word and in
leisure...do not hurry....this is a treasure...

For those lucky to still be blessed with your Mom, this is beautiful. For those of us who aren't, this is even more beautiful. For those who are moms, you'll love this.

The young mother set her foot on the path of life. "Is this the long way?" she asked. And the guide said: "Yes, and the way is hard. And you will be old before you reach the end of it. But the end will be better than the beginning."

But the young mother was happy, and she would not believe that anything could be better than these years. So she played with her children, and gathered flowers for them along the way, and bathed them in the clear streams; and the sun shone on them, and the young Mother cried, "Nothing will ever be lovelier than this."

Then the night came, and the storm, and the path was dark, and the children shook with fear and cold, and the mother drew them close and covered them with her mantle, and the children said, "Mother, we are not afraid, for you are near, and no harm can come."

And the morning came, and there was a hill ahead, and the children climbed and grew weary, and the mother was weary. But at all times she said to the children," A little patience and we are there." So the children climbed, and when they reached the top they said, "Mother, we would not have done it without you."

And the mother, when she lay down at night looked up at the stars and said, "This is a better day than the last, for my children have learned fortitude in the face of hardness. Yesterday I gave them courage. Today, I 've given them strength."

And the next day came strange clouds which darkened the earth, clouds of war and hate and evil, and the children groped and stumbled, and the mother said: "Look up. Lift your eyes to the light. " And the children looked and saw above the clouds an everlasting glory, and it guided them beyond the darkness. And that night the Mother said, "This is the best day of all, for I have shown my children God."

And the days went on, and the weeks and the months and the years, and the mother grew old and she was little and bent. But her children were tall and strong, and walked with courage. And when the way was rough, they lifted her, for she was as light as a feather; and at last they came to a hill, and beyond they could see a shining road and golden gates flung wide. And mother said, "I have reached the end of my journey. And now I know the end is better than the beginning, for my children can walk alone, and their children after them."

And the children said, "You will always walk with us, Mother, even when you have gone through the gates." And they stood and watched her as she went on alone, and the gates closed after her. And they said: "We cannot see her but she is with us still. A Mother like ours is more than a memory. She is a living presence......."

Your Mother is always with you.... She's the whisper of the leaves as you walk down the street; she's the smell of bleach in your freshly laundered socks; she's the cool hand on your brow when you're not well. Your Mother lives inside your laughter. And she's crystallized in every tear drop. She's the place you came from, your first home; and she's the map you follow with every step you take. She's your first love and your first heartbreak, and nothing on earth can separate you.

Not time, not space... not even death!

PASS THIS ON TO ALL THE MOTHERS & CHILDREN YOU KNOW.
MAY WE NEVER TAKE OUR MOTHERS FOR GRANTED...

Pass it on to the men too because they have mothers too....

Strange Car Ad

2006-02-26T16:37:00.000-05:00

Here is a strange one. Read the text first, then open the attachment. Turn up the volume to the max. Sometimes it's hard to hear.

This is a car advertisement from Great Britain. When they finished filming the ad, the film editor noticed something moving along the side of the car, like a ghostly white mist. The ad was never put on TV because of the unexplained ghostly phenomenon.

Watch the front end of the car as it clears the trees in the middle of the screen
and you'll see the white mist crossing in front of the car then following it along
the road......Spooky!

Is it a ghost, or is it simply mist? You decide.

Watch the unaired ad.

Good Chills

2006-02-26T16:23:00.000-05:00

This will give you the chills.......GOOD chills.

A young man had been to Wednesday night Bible Study. The Pastor had shared about listening to God and obeying the Lord's voice.

The young man couldn't help but wonder, "Does God still speak to people?"

After service he went out with some friends for coffee and pie and they discussed the message. Several different ones talked about how God had led them in different ways.

It was about ten o'clock when the young man started driving home. Sitting in his car, he just began to pray, "God...If you still speak to people speak to me. I will listen. I will do my best to obey."

As he drove down the main street of his town, he had the strangest thought to stop and buy a gallon of milk. He shook his head and said out loud, "God is that you?"

He didn't get a reply and started on toward home. But again, the thought, buy a gallon of milk. The young man thought about Samuel and how he didn't recognize the voice of God, and how little Samuel ran to Eli.

"Okay, God, in case that is you, I will buy the milk."

It didn't seem like too hard a test of obedience. He could always use the milk. He stopped and purchased the gallon of milk and started off toward home.

As he passed Seventh Street, he again felt the urge, "Turn Down that street."

This is crazy he thought and drove on past the intersection. Again, he felt that he should turn down Seventh Street. At the next intersection, he turned back and headed down Seventh.

Half jokingly, he said out loud, "Okay, God, I will".

He drove several blocks, when suddenly, he felt like he should stop. He pulled over to the curb and looked around. He was in semi commercial area of town. It wasn't the best but it wasn't the worst of neighborhoods either. The businesses were closed and most of the houses looked dark like the people were already in bed.

Again, he sensed something, "Go and give the milk to the people in the house across the street"

The young man looked at the house. It was dark and it looked like the people were either gone or they were already asleep. He started to open the door and then sat back in the car seat.

"Lord, this is insane. Those people are asleep and if I wake them up, they are going to be mad and I will look stupid."

Again, he felt like he should go and give the milk.

Finally, he opened the door, "Okay God, if this is you, I will go to the door and I will give them the milk. If you want me to look like a crazy person, okay. I want to be obedient. I guess that will count for something but if they don't answer right away, I am out of here."

He walked across the street and rang the bell. He could hear some noise inside.

A man's voice yelled out, "Who is it? What do you
want?"

Then the door opened before the young man could get away. The man was standing there in his jeans and T-shirt. He looked like he just got out of bed. He had a strange look on his face and he didn't seem too happy to have some stranger standing on his doorstep.

"What is it?"

The young man thrust out the gallon of milk, "Here, I brought this to you."

The man took the milk and rushed down a hallway. Then from down the hall came a woman carrying the milk toward the kitchen. The man was following her holding a baby. The baby was crying. The man had tears streaming down his face.

The man began speaking and half crying, "We were just praying. We had some big bills this month and we ran out of money. We didn't have any milk for our baby. I was just praying and asking God to show me how to get some milk."

His wife in the kitchen yelled out, "I ask him to send an Angel with some. Are you an Angel?"

The young man reached into his wallet and pulled out all the money he had on him and put in the man's hand. He turned and walked back toward his car and the tears were
streaming down his face. He knew that God still answers prayers.

THIS IS A SIMPLE TEST....? If you believe that God is alive and well, send this to at least ten people and the person that sent it to you!!!!!!!!

This is so true. Sometimes it's the simplest things that God asks us to do that cause us, if we are obedient to what He's asking, to be able to hear His voice more clear than ever.

Please listen, and obey! It will bless you (and the world).

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me - Phil 4:13

This is an easy test, you score 100 or zero. It's your choice. If you aren't ashamed to do this, please follow the directions. Jesus said, "If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father."

Not ashamed Pass this on . .

Need this back ^j^

2006-02-26T16:16:00.000-05:00

^j^ ^j^ ^j^ ^j^ ^j^ ^j^ ^j^ ^j^

8 angels are sent 2 you. You must send them to 8 people including me.
In 8 minutes you will receive something you have long awaited. Have
Faith!

Remember: Whatever Happens, Happens for a Reason

2006-02-24T19:47:00.000-05:00

Read Each One Carefully and Think About It a Second or Two

I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.
No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.
Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.
Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.
Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.

REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.

True friends: How many people actually have 8 true friends?
Hardly anyone I know ! But some of us have all right friends and good friends!!!

You have been Tagged by the Green Dog!

,-._,-.
\/)"(\/
(_o_)

ruff!!!!!!

You will Have Good Luck For Two Years if you send this to 8 people or more and if this is sent back to you then you are a true friend......

You must send it in 5 minutes or your good luck will run out.

Worth Repeating

2006-01-20T20:03:00.000-05:00

This Pastor has guts!! Thought you might enjoy this interesting prayer given in Kansas at the opening session of their Senate. It seems prayer still upsets some people. When Minister Joe Wright was asked to open the new session of the Kansas Senate, everyone was expecting the usual generalities, but this is what they heard:

"Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask your forgiveness and to seek your direction and guidance. We know Your Word says, 'Woe to those who call evil good,' but that is exactly what we have done. We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed our values.

We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery.
We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare.
We have killed our unborn and called it choice.
We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable.
We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building self esteem.
We have abused power and called it politics.
We have coveted our neighbor's possessions and called it ambition.
We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called it freedom of expression
We have ridiculed the time-honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment.

Search us, Oh, God, and know our hearts today; cleanse us from every sin and set us free. Amen!"

The response was immediate. A number of legislators walked out during the prayer in protest. In 6 short weeks, Central Christian Church, where Rev. Wright is pastor, logged more than 5,000 phone calls with only 47 of those calls responding negatively. The church is now receiving international requests for copies of this prayer from India, Africa and Korea.

Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer on his radio program, "The Rest of the Story," and received a larger response to this program than any other he has ever aired.

With the Lord's help, may this prayer sweep over our nation and wholeheartedly become our desire so that we again can be called "one nation under God."

If possible, please pass this prayer on to your friends. "If you don't stand for something, you will fall for everything."

Think about this: If you forward this prayer to everyone on your e-mail list, in less than 30 days it would be heard by the world. How many people in your address book will not receive this prayer.

To All The Kids Who Survived the 1930's, 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's !!

2006-01-20T19:54:00.000-05:00

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing and didn't get tested for diabetes.
Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paints.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a water bottle.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle, and NO ONE actually died from this.
We ate cupcakes, bread and butter and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms..........
. . WE HAD FRIENDS . . . we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and ate worms and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes, nor did the worms live in us forever.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned
HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

And YOU are one of them!

You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids,
before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good.

A GOOD ONE TO PASS ON

2006-01-20T19:48:00.000-05:00

If I get this 100 times, I will continue to forward it to others in the hopes that they will do the same. We must never forget who gets the credit for the freedoms we have, of which we should be eternally grateful. KEEP THIS GOING PLEASE

I watched the flag pass by one day,
It fluttered in the breeze.
A young Marine saluted it,
And then he stood at ease..
I looked at him in uniform
So young, so tall, so proud,
With hair cut square and eyes alert
He'd stand out in any crowd.

I thought how many men like him
Had fallen through the years.
How many died on foreign soil
How many mothers' tears?
How many pilots' planes shot down?
How many died at sea
How many foxholes were soldiers' graves?
No, freedom isn't free.

I heard the sound of Taps one night,
When everything was still,
I listened to the bugler play
And felt a sudden chill.
I wondered just how many times
That Taps had meant "Amen,"
When a flag had draped a coffin.
Of a brother or a friend.

I thought of all the children,
Of the mothers and the wives,
Of fathers, sons and husbands
With interrupted lives.
I thought about a graveyard
At the bottom of the sea
Of unmarked graves in Arlington.
No, freedom isn't free.

Enjoy Your Freedom & God Bless Our Troops
Show Your Support Send This Page Along Today

When you receive this, please stop for a moment and
Say a prayer for our servicemen. There is nothing attached.... This can be very powerful.... Just send this to all the people in your address book. Do not stop the wheel, please....

Of all the gifts you could give a US Soldier, Prayer is the very best one.

Red Fridays

2006-01-20T19:45:00.000-05:00

Very soon, you will see a great many people wearing Red every Friday. The reason? Americans who support our troops used to be called the "silent majority." We are no longer silent, and are voicing our love for God, country and home in record breaking numbers. We are not organized, boisterous or overbearing. We get no liberal media coverage on TV, to reflect our message or our opinions.

Many Americans, like you, me and all our friends, simply want to recognize that the vast majority of America supports our troops. Our idea of showing solidarity and support for our troops with dignity and respect starts this Friday-and continues each and every Friday until the troops all come home, sending a deafening message that.. Every red-blooded American who supports our men and women afar, will wear something red.

By word of mouth, press, TV -- let's make the United States on every Friday a sea of red much like a homecoming football game in the bleachers. If every one of us who loves this country will share this with acquaintances, coworkers, friends, and family. It will not be long before the USA is covered in RED and it will let our troops know the once "silent" majority is on their side more than ever, certainly more than the media lets on.

The first thing a soldier says when asked "What can we do to make things better for you?" is...We need your support and your prayers. Let's get the word out and lead with class and dignity, by example; and wear something red every Friday.

IF YOU AGREE -- THEN SEND THIS ON -- IF YOU couldn't CARE LESS -- THEN HIT THE DELETE BUTTON --- IT IS YOUR CHOICE. WE LIVE IN THE LAND OF THE FREE, ONLY BECAUSE OF THE BRAVE

Beans!

2006-01-20T19:16:00.000-05:00

Once there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her.

Then one day she met a man and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for this carrying on." She made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.

Some months later her car broke down on the way home from work. Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told him that she would be late because she had to walk home. On her way, she passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than she could stand. Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk off any ill effects by the time she reached home.

So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it.

Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table. She seated herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife, the telephone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He then went to answer the telephone.

The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one leg and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulp wood mill. She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously.

Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded her of cooked cabbage. Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went on like this for another ten minutes. When the telephone farewells signaled the end of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more times with her napkin, placed it on her lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself.

She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned, apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she assured him that she had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!! There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a "Happy Birthday"!!!

Now forward this to all of your friends who deserve a good laugh!!

You Are A Keeper

2005-12-09T19:55:00.000-05:00

TO A KEEPER!!!

One day someone's mother died.

And on that clear, cold morning,
in the warmth of her bedroom,
the daughter was struck with
the pain of learning that sometimes
there isn't any more.

No more hugs,
no more lucky moments to celebrate together,
no more phone calls just to chat,
no more "just one minute."

Sometimes, what we care about the most goes away.
never to return before we can say good-bye,
say "I Love You."

So while we have it. It's best we love it . . .
and care for it and fix it when it's broken .
and take good care of it when it's sick.

This is true for marriage .... and friendships ...

And children with bad report cards;
And dogs with bad hips;
And aging parents and grandparents.
We keep them because they are worth it,
because we cherish them!

Some things we keep --
like a best friend who moved away
or a classmate we grew up with.
There are just some things that make us happy, no
matter what.

Life is important,
and so are the people we know . .
and so, we keep them close!

I received this from someone today
who thought I was a 'KEEPER'!

Then I sent It to the people
I think of in the same way!

Now it's your turn to send this to all those people
who are "keepers" in your life!!

Thank you very much
for being a special part of MY life!

YOU ARE A KEEPER!!

Golf

2005-11-21T22:28:00.000-05:00

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle, followed by a good bottle of beer.
Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.
"I wish I could play my normal game...just once."
"Golf is harder than baseball. In golf, you have to play your foul balls."
If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even during a hurricane, here's a valuable tip: your life is in trouble.
Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot rarely make a perfect shot.
The term "mulligan" is really a contraction of the phrase "maul it again."
A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers..neither of whom can putt very well.
An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse.
Golf's a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out and, for no reason at all, you really stink.
I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play.
If your best shots are the practice swing and the "gimme putt", you might wish to reconsider this game.
Achieving a certain level of success in golf is only important if you can finally enjoy the level you've reached after you've reached it.
Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.
Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won't work. And both are expensive.
The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.
To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add correctly.
In golf, some people tend to get confused with all the numbers...they shoot a six, yell fore and write five.
Swing easy. Hit hard.
If you find yourself pleased that you locate more balls in the rough than you actually have lost, your focus is totally wrong and your personality might not be right for golf... it is also just a matter of time before the IRS investigates your business.
Why is it twice as difficult to hit a ball over water than sand?
"The greatest sound in golf is the Woosh, Woosh, Woosh of youropponent's club as he hurls it across the fairway"

"Honky Tonky" piano

2005-11-21T21:58:00.000-05:00

This is a good one. The story has meaning and the piano is really honky tonky

Turn up your speakers - get up and dance around - life is a gift - don't throw it away!

I love this !
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MOMENTS IN LIFE

There are moments in life when you miss someone
so much that you just want to pick them from
your dreams and hug them for real!

When the door of happiness closes, another opens;
but often times we look so long at the
closed door that we don't see the one,
which has been opened for us.

Don't go for looks; they can deceive.
Don't go for wealth; even that fades away.
Go for someone who makes you smile,
because it takes only a smile to
make a dark day seem bright.
Find the one that makes your heart smile.

Dream what you want to dream;
go where you want to go;
be what you want to be,
because you have only one life
and one chance to do all the things
you want to do.

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet,
enough trials to make you strong,
enough sorrow to keep you human and
enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don't necessarily
have the best of everything;
they just make the most of
everything that comes along their way.

The brightest future will always
be based on a forgotten past;
you can't go forward in life until
you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

When you were born, you were crying
and everyone around you was smiling.
Live your life so at the end,
you're the one who is smiling and everyone
around you is crying.

Please send this message to those people
who mean something to you ;
to those who have touched your life in one way or another;
to those who make you smile when you really need it;
to those who make you see the
brighter side of things when you are really down;
to those whose friendship you appreciate;
to those who are so meaningful in your life.

If you don't send it, don't worry,
nothing bad will happen to you!!

Don't count the years-count the memories...........

A Poem That Gives You Goosebumps

2005-11-21T20:42:00.000-05:00

A drunk man in an Oldsmobile
They said had run the light
That caused the six-car pileup
On 109 that night.

When broken bodies lay about
"And blood was everywhere,"
"The sirens screamed out eulogies,"
For death was in the air.

"A mother, trapped inside her car,"
Was heard above the noise;
Her plaintive plea near split the air:
"Oh, God, please spare my boys!"

She fought to loose her pinned hands;
"She struggled to get free,"
But mangled metal held her fast
In grim captivity.

Her frightened eyes then focused
"On where the back seat once had been,"
But all she saw was broken glass and
Two children's seats crushed in.

Her twins were nowhere to be seen;
"She did not hear them cry, "
"And then she prayed they'd been thrown free, "
"Oh, God, don't let them die! "

"Then firemen came and cut her loose, "
"But when they searched the back,"
"They found therein no little boys, "
But the seat belts were intact.

They thought the woman had gone mad
"And was traveling alone, "
"But when they turned to question her, "
They discovered she was gone.

Policemen saw her running wild
And screaming above the noise
"In beseeching supplication, "
Please help me find my boys!

They're four years old and wear blue shirts;
"Their jeans are blue to match."
One cop spoke up, "They're in my car, "
And they don't have a scratch.

They said their daddy put them there
"And gave them each a cone, "
Then told them both to wait for Mom
To come and take them home.

"I've searched the area high and low, "
But I can't find their dad.
"He must have fled the scene, "
"I guess, and that is very bad."

The mother hugged the twins and said,
"While wiping at a tear, "
"He could not flee the scene, you see, "
"For he's been dead a year."

"The cop just looked confused and asked, "
"Now, how can that be true? "
"The boys said, "Mommy, Daddy came "
"And left a kiss for you."

"He told us not to worry"
And that you would be all right,
"And then he put us in this car with
"The pretty, flashing light. "

"We wanted him to stay with us, "
"Because we miss him so, "
"But Mommy, he just hugged us tight "
And said he had to go.

He said someday we'd understand
"And told us not to fuss, "
"And he said to tell you, Mommy, "
"He's watching over us."

"The mother knew without a doubt"
"That what they spoke was true, "
"For she recalled their dad's last words, "
" I will watch over you."

The firemen's notes could not explain
"The twisted, mangled car, "
And how the three of them escaped
Without a single scar."

But on the cop's report was scribed, "
"In print so very fine, "
An angel walked the beat tonight
On Highway 109."

The 7 Second Prayer, Just repeat this phrase and see how God moves..

"Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, and bless my family, my home, my friends, and me. Amen. "

Pass this message to 7 people {EXCEPT YOU AND ME}.You will receive a miracle tomorrow.

He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare.....

Sad News

2005-11-13T16:51:00.000-05:00

It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following news:

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.

Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he was still a crusty old man and was considered a roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly dad, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

Prayer Request

2005-11-09T22:45:00.000-05:00

It is my understanding it is 140 degrees in Iraq right now.

Our troops need our prayers for strength....endurance and safety. If it be God's will, beg this war to end. I am sorry but I am not breaking this one.....Let us pray

Prayer chain for our Military...please don't break it
Please send this on after a short prayer.

Prayer for our soldiers...please don't break it

Prayer

"Lord, hold our troops in your loving hands. Protect them as they protect us. Bless them and their families for the selfless acts they perform for us in our time of need. I ask this in the name of Jesus, our Lord and Savior. Amen."

Prayer Request: When you receive this, please stop for a moment and say a prayer for our troops around the world. There is nothing attached.... .. Just send this to all the people in your address book. Do not let it stop with you, please....

Of all the gifts you could give a US Soldier, sailor, Airman, Marine & others deployed in harm's way, Prayer is the very best one

Good Turkey Recipe

2005-11-08T13:34:00.000-05:00

ROAST TURKEY

6-7 lb. TURKEY
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is good.)
1 cup uncooked popcorn (ORVILLE REDENBACHERS LOW FAT)
Salt/pepper to taste
______________________________

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.Brush TURKEY well with melted butter, salt, and pepper. Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking pan with the neck end toward the back of the oven. Listen for the popping sounds.

When the turkey's ass blows the oven door open and the turkey flies across the room, it is done."

Your Driver License is available for public viewing

2005-11-04T10:58:00.000-05:00

This is upsetting but I thought I should pass it along. Check your drivers license. Now you can see anyone's Driver's License on the Internet, including your own! I just searched for mine and there it was.. . picture and all!! Thanks Homeland Security! Where are our rights?

I definitely removed mine. I suggest you do the same. . Go to the web site and check it out. Just enter your name, city and state to see if yours is on file. After your license comes on the screen, click the box marked 'Please Remove'. This will remove it from public viewing, but not from law enforcement. www.license.shorturl.com

Making Pancakes

2005-10-22T19:05:00.000-04:00

Six -year-old Brandon decided one Saturday morning to fix his parents pancakes. He found a big bowl and spoon, pulled a chair to the counter, opened the cupboard and pulled out the heavy flour canister, spilling it on the floor.

He scooped some of the flour into the bowl with his hands, mixed in most of a cup of milk and added some sugar, leaving a floury trail on the floor which by now had a few tracks left by his kitten.

Brandon was covered with flour and getting frustrated. He wanted this to be something very good for Mom and Dad, but it was getting very bad.

He didn't know what to do next, whether to put it all into the oven or on the stove and he didn't know how the stove worked! Suddenly he saw his kitten licking from the bowl of mix and reached to push her away, knocking the egg carton to the floor. Frantically he tried to clean up this monumental mess but slipped on the eggs, getting his pajamas white and sticky.

And just then he saw Dad standing at the door. Big crocodile tears welled up in Brandon's eyes All he'd wanted to do was something good, but he'd made a terrible mess He was sure a scolding was coming, maybe even a spanking. But his father just watched him.

Then, walking through the mess, he picked up his crying son, hugged him and loved him, getting his own pajamas white and sticky in the process!

That's how God deals with us. We try to do something good in life, but it turns into a mess. Our marriage gets all sticky or we insult a friend, or we can't stand our job, or our health goes sour.

Sometimes we just stand there in tears because we can't think of anything else to do. That's when God picks us up and loves us and forgives us, even though some of our mess gets all over Him.

But just because we might mess up, we can't stop trying to "make pancakes" for God or for others. Sooner or later we'll get it right, and then they'll be glad we tried...

I was thinking. .. and I wondered if I had any wounds needing to be healed, friendships that need rekindling or three words needing to be said, sometimes, "I love you" can heal & bless! Remind every one of your friends that you love them. Even if you think ey don't love back, you would be amazed at what those three little words, a smile, and a reminder likes this can do.

Just in case I haven't told you lately... I LOVE YA!!!Please pass some of this love on to others....suppose one morning you were called to God; do all your friends know you love them?

Send this to everyone you love, and send it back to the person who sent it to you.. And never stop "making pancakes."

Our days are happier when we give people a bit of our heart rather than a piece of our mind.

Happiness Fairy

2005-10-15T15:46:00.000-04:00

LET ME KNOW IF YOU GET THIS ONE

2005-10-04T08:54:00.000-04:00

This is without a doubt one of the nicest good luck forwards I have received. Hope it works for you -- and me!

You have 6 minutes There's some mighty fine advice in these words, even if you're not superstitious.! This has been sent To you for good luck from the Anthony Robbins organization. It has been sent around the world ten times so Far. Do not keep this message. must leave your hands in 6 MINUTES. Otherwise you will get a very unpleasant surprise. This is true, even if you are not superstitious, agnostic, or otherwise faith impaired.

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.
FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.
SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.
EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much.
NINE. Love ! deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.
TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.
THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"
FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.
SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson
SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.

Now, here's the FUN part!
Send this to at least 5 people and your life will improve.
1-4 people: Your life will improve slightly.
5-9 people: Your life will improve to your liking.
9-14 people: You will have at least 5 surprises in the next 3 weeks 15 and above: Your life will improve drastically and everything you ever dreamed of will begin to take shape.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart. Do not keep this message

A return is requested....Please

2005-10-04T08:48:00.000-04:00

SURE HOPE THIS LITTLE GUY DOESN'T RUN OUT OF BREATH BEFORE HE GETS TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

Send it back, you'll see why
A Box of gold

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

With a secret inside
that has never
been told

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

This box is priceless
but as I see

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The treasure inside is
precious to me

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Today I share this
treasure with thee

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It's the treasure of
friendship you've
given me.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

If this comes back to you
then you'll have a friend
for life but, if this
becomes deleted, you are
not a friend.
Send this to everyone you
consider a friend!!
This is a magic frog.
It will grant you one wish and only one wish,
that is, if you decide to send this to others. You can wish for anything.
Repeat your wish until you have stopped scrolling.
Make it count!!!!!!

STOP!!!!!!!!

FOR YOUR WISH TO COME TRUE YOU HAVE TO SEND IT
TO:
3 PEOPLE - YOUR WISH WILL COME TRUE EVENTUALLY
5 PEOPLE - YOUR WISH WILL COME TRUE IN 3 MONTHS
10 PEOPLE - YOUR WISH WILL COME TRUE IN 5 WEEKS
15 PEOPLE - YOUR WISH WILL COME TRUE IN 1 WEEK

CAN'T WAIT A WEEK???
22 PEOPLE - YOUR WISH WILL
COME TRUE IN 1 DAY!!!!!

****************REMEMBER**************
THIS MUST BE SENT OUT THE
DAY YOU READ IT FOR YOUR
WISH TO GET GRANTED.
come on it is fun to see the little frogs and stuff

Life Is Like A Box of Chocolates

2005-10-02T21:50:00.000-04:00

Forrest Gump - Life is like a Box of chocolates...
Forrest Dahmer - People are like a box of chocolate, YUM!
Forrest Simpson - Mmmmm, chocolate...
Forrest the Hun - Chocolate all mine!
Forrest Simmons - Chocolate is bad! EXERCISE! EXERCISE!
Forrest Rivera - People who like Chocolate..Next on "Forrest"
Forrest Shakespeare - Chocolate, or no chocolate. That is the question
Forrest Of Borg - All chocolates must be assimilated
Forrest Presley - Hunk a hunk of milk chocolate
Forrest Zen - I am one with the chocolate
Forrest McClain - I used to be a box of Chocolates
Forrest Ventura - Chocolates...Alll-Riighty then...
Forrest Lauper - Girls just wanna have chocolate
Forrest Turner - What's chocolate gotta do, gotta do with it?
Forrest Spock - Logically speaking, we are all chocolate
Forrest Scotty - The box...she's breaking apart Capt'n
Forrest Rooney - Why is it that we are all chocolates?
Forrest Butler - Frankly Scarlett, I don't like chocolate
Forrest O'Hara - Tomorrow, is another box of chocolates.
Forrest Lee - Fight with your inner chocolate
Forrest Doo - Roinks Raggy, Rocolates!
Forrest Pig - Life is a box of choc-choa-che..candy
Forrest Marx - That's the weirdest box of chocolates I've ever seen....
Forrest Copperfield - POOF! The chocolates are gone!
Forrest X - We didn't land in the box of chocolate The box of chocolate landed on us
Forrest Hitler - White Chocolates only!
Forrest Eastwood - Do you feel hungry,PUNK? Well...DO YOU?
Forrest Barney - I'm cream filled, You're with nuts, We're a box of chocoluts...
Forrest Adam and Eve - ADAM=Chocolates are forbidden EVE=Just eat one....
Forrest Moses - I command the chocolates to separate!
Forrest Noah - 2 creams, 2 nuts, 2 coconuts, 2 peanut butter...
Forrest Christ - Let he without sin, eat the first chocolate
Forrest On Phonics - Lief es lyk a boks uv chakolets
Forrest PsychicLine - Yes, I knew you were a chocolate
Forrest Alimony - The Box is mine!
The Forrest plague - Ewww..these Chocolates are bad
Forrest Andrews - The Hills are alive...like a box of chocolates
Forrest Vader - Luke...I am your chocolate
Forrest Yoda - There is a dark chocolate, and a light chocolate...
Forrest Obi 1 Kenobi - May the chocolate be with you
Forrest Trebeck - The answer: This is like a box of Chocolate (Contestant): What is Life?
Forrest Fudd - Wife is wike a box uv chocowates
Forrest Lincoln - Forescore and several chocolates ago...
Forrest Satan - Life is a box of melted chocolates
Forrest Bond - Life's a box of exploding chocolate
Forrest Hall - Will you take the Box of Chocolates, or what's behind DOOR NUMBER TWO?
Forrest Press Your Luck - Box of Chocolates! No Whammies...STOP!
Forrest of Fortune - LIFE I_ LIKE _ __X _F CH_C_L_TE_
Forrest Popeye - I yam a box of Chocolets...yuk, yuk, yuk
Forrest Fife - This Box of Chocolates is a lethal weapon!
Forrest Reagan - Life is a box of um.....
Forrest Bush - This will not be another Box of Chocolates!
Forrest Limbaugh - Life may be a box of Chocolates... But the Democrats are all nuts...
Forrest Native Americans - These chocolates are moving to a smaller box..

Subject: They Need Our Prayers

2005-10-02T20:58:00.000-04:00

Prayer chain for our Military...please don't break it

Please send this on after a short prayer.
Prayer for our soldiers...please don't break it

Prayer

"Lord, hold our troops in your loving hands. Protect them as they protect us. Bless them and their families for the selfless acts they perform for us in our time of need. I ask this in the name of Jesus, our Lord and Savior. Amen."

Prayer Request: When you receive this, please stop for a moment and say a
prayer for our troops around the world. There is nothing attached.... . Just send this to all the people in your address book. Do not let it stop with you, please.... Of all the gifts you could give a US Soldier, Sailor, Airman, Marine & others deployed in harm's way, Prayer is the very best one!

Soldiers' Funeral (Texas Style)

2005-10-02T20:51:00.000-04:00

There's something to be said for being raised in a small town.

What follows is a message from Vicki Pierce about her nephew James' funeral (he was serving our country in Iraq):

"I'm back, it was certainly a quick trip, but I have to also say it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. There is a lot to be said for growing up in a small town in Texas. The service itself was impressive with wonderful flowers and sprays, a portrait of James, his uniform and boots, his awards and ribbons. There was lots of military brass and an eloquent (though inappropriately longwinded) Baptist preacher. There were easily 1000 people at the service, filling the church sanctuary as well as the fellowship hall and spilling out into the parking lot.

However, the most incredible thing was what happened following the service on the way to the cemetery. We went to our cars and drove to the cemetery escorted by at least 10 police cars with lights flashing and some other emergency vehicles, with Texas Rangers handling traffic. Everyone on the road who was not in the procession, pulled over, got out of their cars, and stood silently and respectfully, some put their hands over their hearts.

When we turned off the highway suddenly there were teenage boys along both sides of the street about every 20 feet or so, all holding large American flags on long flag poles, and again with their hands on their hearts. We thought at first it was the Boy Scouts or 4H club or something, but it continued .... for two and a half miles. Hundreds of young people, standing silently on the side of the road with flags. At one point we passed an elementary school, and all the children were outside, shoulder to shoulder holding flags . kindergartners, handicapped, teachers, staff, everyone. Some held signs of love and support. Then came teenage girls and younger boys, all holding flags. Then adults. Then families. All standing silently on the side of the road. No one spoke, not even the very young children.

The military presence..at least two generals, a fist full of colonels, and representatives from every branch of the service, plus the color guard which attended James, and some who served with him ... was very impressive and respectful, but the love and pride from this community who had lost one of their own was the most amazing thing I've ever been privileged to witness.

I've attached some pictures, some are blurry (we were moving), but you can get a small idea of what this was like. Thanks so much for all the prayers and support."

THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST MOVING E-MAILS I'VE SEEN TO DATE. GO USA and GOD BLESS ALL OF OUR SOLDIERS!

These photos are awesome!!

History Lesson

2005-10-02T20:31:00.000-04:00

Have a history teacher explain this----- if they can.

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House.
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Now it gets really weird.

Lincoln 's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.

Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.

Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.

Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.

Now hang on to your seat.

Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford.'
Kennedy was shot in a car called ' Lincoln' made by 'Ford.'

Lincoln was shot in a theater and his assassin ran and hid in a warehouse.
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a theater.

Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the kicker... A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

Creepy huh? Send this to as many people as you can, cause: Hey, this is one history lesson people don't mind reading

Something about God

2005-10-02T20:18:00.000-04:00

Read only if you have time for God

Let me tell you, make sure you read all the way to the bottom. I almost deleted this email but I was blessed when I got to the end

God, when I received this e-mail, I thought... I don't have time for this... And, this is really inappropriate during work.
Then, I realized that this kind of thinking is... Exactly, what has caused lot of the problems in our world today.
We try to keep God in church on Sunday morning...
Maybe, Sunday night...
And, the unlikely event of a midweek service.
We do like to have Him around during sickness...
And, of course, at funerals.
However, we don't have time, or room, for Him during work or play...
Because.. That's the part of our lives we think... We can, and should, handle on our own.
May God forgive me for ever thinking...
That... there is a time or place where..
HE is not to be FIRST in my life.
We should always have time to remember all HE has done for us.
If, You aren't ashamed to do this...
Please follow the directions.

Jesus said, "If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father."
Not ashamed?
Pass this on ONLY IF YOU MEAN IT!!

Yes, I do Love God.
HE is my source of existence and Savior.
He keeps me functioning each and every day. Without Him, I will be nothing. But, with Christ, HE strengthens me. (Phil 4:13)

This is the simplest test.
If You Love God... And, are not ashamed of all the marvelous things HE has done for you...
Send this to ten people and the person who sent it to you!
I don't think I know 10 people who would admit they love Jesus. Do You love Him?

THE POEM
I knelt to pray but not for long, I had too much to do.
I had to hurry and get to work
For bills would soon be due. S
o I knelt and said a hurried prayer,
And jumped up off my knees.
My Christian duty was now done
My soul could rest at ease.
All day long I had no time
To spread a word of cheer.
No time to speak of Christ to friends,
They'd laugh at me I'd fear.
No time, no time, too much to do,
That was my constant cry,
No time to give to souls in need
But at last the time, the time to die.
I went before the Lord, I came,
I stood with downcast eyes.
For in his hands God held a book;
It was the book of life.
God looked into his book and said
"Your name I cannot find.
I once was going to write it down...
But never found the time"

Now do you have the time to pass it on?
Make sure that you scroll through to the end.

Easy vs. Hard
Why is it so hard to tell the truth but Yet so easy to tell a lie?
Why are we so sleepy in church but Right when the sermon is over we suddenly wake up?
Why is it so hard to talk about God but yet so easy to talk about nasty stuff?
Why is it so boring to look at a Christian magazine, but yet so easy to look at a nasty one?
Why is it so easy to delete a Godly e- ma il, but yet we forward all of the nasty ones?
Why are the churches getting smaller but yet the bars and dance clubs are getting larger?
Do you give up? Think about it . Are you going to forward this, or delete it?

Just remember-God is watching you.

Prayer Wheel-Let's see the devil stop this one!
Here's what the wheel is all about.

When you receive this, say a prayer for the person that sent it to you....
That's all you have to do....
There is nothing attached....
This is so powerful....
Do not stop the wheel, please....
Of all the free gifts we may receive, Prayer is the very best one....
There are no costs, but wonderful rewards... GOD BLESS!

May God keep you and bless you. If this doesn't give you chills, nothing will...this message is very true. Hope you are all as blessed as I was from this story. I wonder how many people will delete this without reading it because of the title on it?

There once was a man named George Thomas, pastor in a small New England town. One Easter Sunday morning he came to the Church carrying a rusty, bent, old bird cage, and set it by the pulpit. Eyebrows were raised and, as if in response, Pastor Thomas began to speak..."I was walking through town yesterday when I saw a young boy coming toward me swinging this bird cage. On the bottom of the cage were three little wild birds, shivering with cold and fright. I stopped the lad and asked, "What you got there, son?" "Just some old birds," came the reply.
"What are you gonna do with them?" I asked.

"Take 'em home and have fun with 'em," he answered. "I'm gonna tease 'em and pull out their feathers to make 'em fight. I'm gonna have a real good time" "But you'll get tired of those birds sooner or later. What will you do?"

"Oh, I got some cats," said the little boy. "They like birds. I'll take 'em to them."
The pastor was silent for a moment. "How much do you want for those birds, son?"
"Huh?? !!! Why, you don't want them birds, mister. They're just plain old field birds. They don't sing. They ain't even pretty!"

"How much?" the pastor asked again. The boy sized up the pastor as if he were crazy and said, "$10?" The pastor reached in his pocket and took out a ten dollar bill. He placed it in the boy's hand. In a flash, the boy was gone.

The pastor picked up the cage and gently carried it to the end of the alley where there was a tree and a grassy spot Setting the cage down, he opened the door, and by softly tapping the bars persuaded the birds out, setting them free.

Well, that explained the empty bird cage on the pulpit, and then the pastor began to tell this story.

One day Satan and Jesus were having a conversation. Satan had just come from the Garden of Eden, and he was gloating and boasting. "Yes, sir, I just caught the world full of people down there. Set me a trap, used bait I knew they couldn't resist. Got 'em all!"

"What are you going to do with them?" Jesus asked.

Satan replied, "Oh, I'm gonna have fun! I'm gonna teach them how to marry and divorce each other, how to hate and abuse each other, how to drink and smoke and curse. I'm gonna teach them how to invent guns and bombs and kill each other. I'm really gonna have fun!"

"And what will you do when you get done with them?" Jesus asked. "Oh, I'll kill 'em," Satan glared proudly. "How much do you want for them?" Jesus asked

"Oh, you don't want those people. They ain't no good. Why, you'll take them and they'll just hate you. They'll spit on you, curse you and kill you. You don't want those people!!"

"How much?" He asked again.

Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, "All your blood, tears and your life."

Jesus said, "DONE!"

Then He paid the price.

The pastor picked up the cage he opened the door and he walked from the pulpit.

Notes: Isn't it funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell.

Isn't it funny how someone can say "I believe in God" but still follow Satan (who, by the way, also "believes" in God).

Isn't it funny how you can send a thousand jokes through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing?

Isn't it funny how when you go to forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them.

Isn't it funny how I can be more worried about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me.

I pray, for everyone who sends this to their entire address book, they will be blessed by God in a way special for them.

And send it back to the person who sent it, to let them know that indeed it was sent out to many more.

A message from Michael Moore

2005-10-02T20:10:00.000-04:00

Friday, September 2nd, 2005

Dear Mr. Bush:

Any idea where all our helicopters are? It's Day 5 of Hurricane Katrina and thousands remain stranded in New Orleans and need to be airlifted. Where on earth could you have misplaced all our military choppers? Do you need help finding them? I once lost my car in a Sears parking lot. Man, was that a drag.

Also, any idea where all our national guard soldiers are? We could really use them right now for the type of thing they signed up to do like helping with national disasters. How come they weren't there to begin with?

Last Thursday I was in south Florida and sat outside while the eye of Hurricane Katrina passed over my head. It was only a Category 1 then but it was pretty nasty. Eleven people died and, as of today, there were still homes without power. That night the weatherman said this storm was on its way to New Orleans. That was Thursday! Did anybody tell you? I know you didn't want to interrupt your vacation and I know how you don't like to get bad news. Plus, you had fundraisers to go to and mothers of dead soldiers to ignore and smear. You sure showed her!

I especially like how, the day after the hurricane, instead of flying to Louisiana, you flew to San Diego to party with your business peeps. Don't let people criticize you for this -- after all, the hurricane was over and what the heck could you do, put your finger in the dike?

And don't listen to those who, in the coming days, will reveal how you specifically reduced the Army Corps of Engineers' budget for New Orleans this summer for the third year in a row. You just tell them that even if you hadn't cut the money to fix those levees, there weren't going to be any Army engineers to fix them anyway because you had a much more important construction job for them -- BUILDING DEMOCRACY IN IRAQ!

On Day 3, when you finally left your vacation home, I have to say I was moved by how you had your Air Force One pilot descend from the clouds as you flew over New Orleans so you could catch a quick look of the disaster. Hey, I know you couldn't stop and grab a bullhorn and stand on some rubble and act like a commander in chief. Been there done that.

There will be those who will try to politicize this tragedy and try to use it against you. Just have your people keep pointing that out. Respond to nothing. Even those pesky scientists who predicted this would happen because the water in the Gulf of Mexico is getting hotter and hotter making a storm like this inevitable. Ignore them and all their global warming Chicken Littles. There is nothing unusual about a hurricane that was so wide it would be like having one F-4 tornado that stretched from New York to Cleveland.

No, Mr. Bush, you just stay the course. It's not your fault that 30 percent of New Orleans lives in poverty or that tens of thousands had no transportation to get out of town. C'mon, they're black! I mean, it's not like this happened to Kennebunkport. Can you imagine leaving white people on their roofs for five days? Don't make me laugh! Race has nothing -- NOTHING -- to do with this!

You hang in there, Mr. Bush. Just try to find a few of our Army helicopters and send them there. Pretend the people of New Orleans and the Gulf Coast are near Tikrit.

Yours,
Michael Moore
MMFlint@aol.com

P.S. That annoying mother, Cindy Sheehan, is no longer at your ranch. She and dozens of other relatives of the Iraqi War dead are now driving across the country, stopping in many cities along the way. Maybe you can catch up with them before they get to DC on September 21st.

----Source: www.MichaelMoore.com

The Poem

2005-10-02T20:02:00.000-04:00

The poem is very true, unfortunately.

Make sure you read the poem!

CASE 1: Kelly Sedey had one wish, for her boyfriend of three years,David Marsden, to propose to her. Then one day when she was out to lunch David proposed! She accepted, but then had to leave because she had a meeting in 20 min. When she got to her office, she noticed on her computer she had some e-mail's. She checked it, the usual stuff from her friends, but then she saw one that she had never gotten before. It was this poem. She simply deleted it without even reading all of it. BIG MISTAKE! Later that evening, she received a phone call from the police It was about DAVID! He had been in an accident with an 18 wheeler. He didn't survive!

CASE 2: Take Katie Robinson. She received this poem and being the believer that she was she sent it to a few of her friends but didn't have enough e-mail addresses to send out the full 5 that you must. Three days later, Katie went to a masquerade ball. Later that night when she left to get to her car, she was killed in that spot by a hit-and-run drunk driver.

CASE 3: Richard S. Willis sent this poem out within 45 minutes of reading it. Not even 4 hours later walking along the street to his new job interview with a really big company, when he ran into Cynthia Bell, his secret love for 5 years. Cynthia came up to him and told him of her passionate crush on him that she had had for 2 years. Three days later, he proposed to her and they got married. Cynthia and Richard are still married with three children, happy as ever!

This is the poem:

Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine but we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
"Tomorrow" I say! "I will call on Jim
Just to show that I'm thinking of him"
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner, yet miles away,
"Here's a telegram sir," "Jim died today."
And that's what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.
Remember to always say what you mean.
If you love someone, tell them.
Don't be afraid to express yourself.
Reach out and tell someone what they mean to you.
Because when you decide that it is the right time it might be too late.
Seize the day. Never have regrets.
And most importantly, stay close to your friends
and family, for they have helped make you the person that you are today.

You must send this on in 3 hours after reading the letter to 10 other people. If you do this, you will receive unbelievably good luck in love. The person that you are most attracted to will soon return to you. If you do not, bad luck will rear its ugly head at you.

THIS IS NOT A JOKE! You have read the warnings, seen the cases, and the consequences. You MUST send this on or face dreadfully bad luck.

*NOTE* the more people that you send this to, the better luck youwill have.

SMILE, even through your tears!!!!!

DM - Hmm, I didn't send it out and I am still alive. I haven't found true love but I am doing OK.

Hurricane Katrina

2005-10-02T19:56:00.000-04:00

You know it was bound to happen. Finally, the truth told like it is....

All the news on the relief effort has been negative. We need to correct this. Here is some information that gets forgotten.

It is the worst storm to ever hit the United States. The flooding in New Orleans happened the day after the Hurricane. FEMA was in the region ready to assist the "Hurricane victims". As fast as humanly possible the aid started flowing in. There are 90,000 square miles of devastation that need to be attended to. The United States is going to over come this as we always do.

Now for the hard truth facts that people need to understand.

1st. Everyone had two full days or more to get the hell out of there respective cities. (in all news coverage there has only been one lady admit that she just didn't take it seriously and that was a mistake)

2nd. With all the folks that didn't heed the warning, that just gutted the aid that is normally given in situations like this

3rd. There is so much talk about lack of response but as aid was trying to get in there was a tremendous amount of unlawfulness in the city.

4th. And really the hottest topic is RACE. Continue to read below

The city of New Orleans in better than seventy five percent black. Better than half of the local government is BLACK. For heavens sake the Mayor is BLACK. So yes if you watch TV or read the news there is going to be mainly BLACK folks there. Hello!!!!!!! Now with that being said there is a rather large percentage of folks there in New Orleans that are poor and yes are again BLACK....So I ask why must this be made a RACE issue. It is a Natural Disaster not a "lets screw the black race over" It is so wrong that the News Media has concentrated so much time exploiting the race card. It is also wrong for our congressional staff to come on national TV and blast the relief aid and say that "slavery was outlawed years ago". Yes it was and is that kind of talk is what continues the "rub" on people today. Let's get on with the relief aid and support all our men and woman and in most cases your brother or sister or mother and father on the front lines in the horrible natural disaster.

Unconditional thanks goes out to the President of the United States and Director of FEMA and all the other people for there time and energy.

PASS THIS ON IN SUPPORT OF OUR COUNTRY IN A TIME OF NEED

DM - And I rushed to pass this on - NOT!!

Fwd: LOUISANA

2005-10-02T19:49:00.000-04:00

Got this from a Friend --- Just take it for what it is worth. One persons viewpoint (but they are there)

This note is from a girl who I work with named Robin. She's in Louisiana and amid all the turmoil there. When I read her story I got the chills, this is horrible. I'm sending this to all of you to spread the word, PRAY. Here's her note:

** We have had a battery operated TV so we've been getting local channels focusing on the situation there and here. I'm just getting the "national perspective" and its *(&*&(*ing me off!
First, this is not a racial thing. I'm sorry if all the reporters are seeing are black faces but if they would take their cameras to places like Slidell, Mandeville, Metairie and CHALMETTE! they would see a several thousand white faces being affected by this. Most of the tip of the boot that is Louisiana south and east of Baton Rouge is under water. Those people are stuck too waiting for help, dying, but all the news people can focus on is the Superdome.

Another misconception. The violence going on there is not the reaction of desperate people. Its typical New Orleans on any given Tuesday!!! Its a dangerous, dirty, drug infested place where the city police and city government is corrupt and useless. Volunteers are getting shot at and their cars vandalized. Helicopters are being shot at. Just another day in the city.

Another misconception. These poor people couldn't get out because they don't have cars. If the cameras show the city once the waters recede, you'll notice all the flooded out cars littering the streets. They couldn't all have been broken down before the storm hit . Yes, there are always people who do not have transportation. Part of making the call for a MANDATORY evacuation is that the city has to provide for transportation and/or shelter in the city. People stayed for the same reasons they always stay. They think the storm will turn and go in another direction. They think they can "ride it out." Or, they're just too (*&( lazy to pack up and leave.

Another misconception. The federal government was slow to respond. The president issued a state of emergency BEFORE the storm ever hit, unprecedented. This means that the full access of the federal government, be it military or civil, were at our governors' disposal. The levee broke early Monday afternoon. She did not call evacuation until Tuesday morning. You cannot call up National Guard units in 20 minutes. It takes time. The governor and mayor are in high CYA mode at the moment.

The situation is bad here. Crime is becoming a problem in Gonzales and Baton Rouge where the evacuees are being housed. We live between the two cities and there is pistol on my desk shelf as a type (yes, I know how to use it). Helicopters flying overhead all day, gas is running out, stores shelves becoming empty. Its like a war zone. Our kids are both here and are staying here until the crime situation gets in control and I fear it will get worse before it gets better. Pray for us. **

SO, that's all I'm asking. SEND this to your friends and right now say a prayer for the people going through this whole catastrophe. Thanks.

A DIFFERENT VIEWPOINT....

2005-10-02T15:15:00.000-04:00

A letter from a VERY UPSET Mississippi Doctor !

What the news does not show...

Thought I might inform the few friends I have on my recent traumatic experience. I am going to tell it straight, blunt, raw, and I don't give a damn. Long read, I know but please do read!!!

I went to volunteer on Saturday at the George R. Brown convention for two reasons.
A: I wanted to help people to get a warm fuzzy.
B: Curiosity.

I've been watching the news lately and have seen scenes that have made me want to vomit. And no it wasn't dead bodies, the city under water, or the sludge everywhere. It was PEOPLE'S BEHAVIOR. The people on TV, (99% being Black) were DEMANDING help. They were not asking nicely but demanding as if society owed these people something. Well the honest truth is WE DON'T.

Help should be asked for in a kind manner and then appreciated. This is not what the press (FOX in particular) was showing, what I was seeing was a group of people who are yelling, demanding, looting, killing, raping, and SHOOTING back at the demanded help!!!!! So I'm thinking this can't possibly be true can it???? So I decide to submit to the DEMAND for help out of SHOCK. I couldn't believe this to be true of the majority of the people who are the weakest of society. So I went to volunteer and help folks out and see the truth. So I will tell the following story and you decide:

I arrived at the astrodome only to find out that there were too many volunteers and that volunteers were needed at the George R. Brown Convention Center. As I was walking up to the Convention Center I noticed a line of cars that wrapped around blocks filled with donations. These were ordinary Houstonians coming with truckloads and trunks full of water, diapers, clothes, blankets, food, all types of good stuff. And lots of it was NEW. I felt that warm fuzzy while helping unload these vehicles of these wonderful human beings. I then went inside the building and noticed approximately 100,000 sq. ft. of clothes, shoes, jackets, toys and all types of goodies all organized and ready for the people in need. I signed up, received a name badge and was on my merry way excited to be useful.

I toured the place to get familiar with my surroundings; the entire place is probably around 2 million sq. ft. I noticed rows as far as the eye can see of mattresses, not cots, BLOW UP MATTRESSES!!! All of which had nice pillows and plenty of blankets. 2 to 3 bottles of water lay on every bed. These full size to queen size beds by the way were comfortable, I laid in one to see for myself. I went to look at the medical area. I couldn't believe what my eyes were seeing!!! A makeshift hospital created in 24 hours!!! It was unbelievable, they even had a pharmacy. I also noticed that they created showers, which would also have hot water. I went upstairs to the third floor to find a HUGE cafeteria created in under 24 hours Rows of tables, chairs and food everywhere - enough to feed an army! I'm not talking about crap food either. They had Jason's deli food, apples, oranges, coke, diet coke, lemonade, orange juice, cookies, all types of chips and sandwiches. All the beverages by the way were put on ice and chilled!!!! In a matter of about 24 hours or less an entire mini-city was erected by volunteers for the poor evacuees. This was not your rundown crap shelter, it was BUM HEAVEN.

So that was the layout: great food, comfy beds, clean showers, free medical help, by the way there was a library, and a theatre room that I forgot to mention. Great stuff right????

Well here is what happened on my journey -

I started by handing out COLD water bottles to evacuees as they got off the bus. Many would take them and only 20% or less said thank you. Lots of them would shake their heads and ask for sodas! So this went on for about 20-30 minutes until I was sick of being an unappreciated servant. I figured certainly these folks would appreciate some food!!! So I went upstairs to serve these beloved evacuees some GOOD food that I wish I could have at the moment!

***The following statements are graphic, truthful, and discuss UNRATIONAL behavior***

Evacuees come slowly to receive this mountain of food that is worth serving to a king! I tell them that we have 2 types of great deli sandwiches to choose from - ham and turkey. Many look at the food in disgust and DEMAND burgers, pizza, and even McDonalds!!!! Jason's deli is better than McDonalds!!!! Only 1 out of ten people who took something would say "thank you" the rest took items as if it was their God given right to be served without a shred of appreciation!!! They would ask for Beer and liquor. They complained that we didn't have good enough food. They refused food and laughed at us. They treated us volunteers as if we where SLAVES. No not all of them of course, but 70% did!!!!!! 20% were appreciative, 10% took the food without any comment and the other 70% had some disgusting comment to say. Some had the nerve to laugh at us. And when I snapped back at them for being mean, they would curse at me!!! Needless to say I was in utter shock. They would eat their food and leave their mess on the table. Some would pick up their stuff, many would leave it for the volunteers to pick up.

I left that real quick to go down and help set up some more beds. I saw many young ladies carrying mattresses and I helped for a while. Then I realized something. There were hundreds of able bodied young men who could help!! I asked a group of young evacuees in their teens and early twenties to help. I got cursed at for asking them to help!!! One said "We just lost our f ' ing homes and you want us to work!!" The next said "Ya Cracker, you got a home we don't." I looked at them in disbelief. Here are women walking by carrying THEIR BEDS and they can't lift a finger and help themselves!!

WHY SHOULD I HELP PEOPLE WHO DON'T WANT TO HELP THEMESELVES!!!!

I waved them off and turned away and was laughed at and more "white boy jokes" were made at me. I felt no need to waste my breath on a bunch of pitiful losers. I went to a nearby restroom where I noticed a man shaving. I used the restroom, washed my hands and saw this man throw his razor towards the trash can...he missed. he walked out leaving his disgusting razor on the floor for some other "cracker" to pick up. Even the little kids were demanding. I saw only ONE white family and only TWO Hispanic families. The rest where blacks. Sorry - 20% to 30% decent blacks, and 70% LOSERS!!!!!

I would call them N*****S, but the actual definition of a n*****r is one who is ignorant, these people were not ignorant..they were ARROGANT A ' HOLES. The majority of which are thugs and lifetime lazy ass welfare recipients. We are inviting the lowest of the low to Houston. And like idiots we are serving the people who will soon steal our cars, rape, murder, and destroy our city while stealing from our pockets on a daily basis through the welfare checks they take. We will fund our own destruction.

By "US" I don't mean a specific race, I mean the people who work hard, work smart, have values and morals. Only people who want to help themselves should be helped, the others should be allowed to destroy themselves. I do not want to work hard, give the government close to half the money I earn so they can in turn give it to a bunch of losers.

I don't believe in being poor for life. My family immigrated here, we came here poor, and now thank God, and due to HARD WORK we are doing fine. If immigrants, who come here, don' t know the language can work and become successful... WHY CAN'T THE MAJORITY OF THE HOMEGROWN DO IT!!! If we continue to reward these losers then we will soon destroy our great country. I just witnessed selfish, arrogant, unappreciative behavior by the very people who need help the most. Now these same people who cursed me, refused my city's generosity, who refuse to help themselves are DEMANDING handouts on their own terms!!!!!!! They prance around as if they are owed something, and when they do receive a handout, they say it's not good enough! Well you know what these types of people can go to hell for all I care!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Richard L. Johnston, M.D.
University of Mississippi Medical Center
3805 Crane Blvd.
Jackson, MS 39216

DM - Dr. Johnston did not write this email. Somewhere along the line, he responded to the email and his name was then attributed to it.

This email is racist and hate provoking. It serves no other purpose but to stir people's anger and feelings of hatred towards others.

For additional info on this email, follow this link: http://www.breakthechain.org/exclusives/johnston.html

angles in my mailbox

2005-10-02T14:52:00.000-04:00

There's an angel in my in box
And she came here from a friend
Who typed in my e-mail address
Then clicked on the button 'Send'

Now there's an angel in your inbox
And you got her straight from me;
I knew when I finished reading this,
It was something you should see.

This little angel in your inbox
Comes with a nice surprise;
For when you send her on to friends,
Her message multiplies.

She brings to you a note of
Happiness, health and song;
And the nicest thing you can do right now
Is to forward her along.

By simply sending her along today
Can make you happy as can be
She should be sent to everyone
Her message is for all to see..

So please send this little angel on,
And have a great day, too;
Just smile and be happy because
This angel was sent to you!

USPS Christmas Stamp (You won't believe this!)

2005-10-02T14:35:00.000-04:00

Why would the post office issue this stamp? Muslims not only don't believe in Christ but consider anyone of Christian, Hebrew, or any religion except theirs as infidels. The upper ecelon of the post office must be sitting on their brains.

CHRISTMAS STAMP How ironic is this??!! They don't even believe in Christ and they're getting their own Christmas stamp, but don't dream of posting the ten commandments on federal property?

USPS New Stamp

This one is impossible to believe. Scroll down for the text. If there is only one thing you forward today.....let it be this!

REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of PanAm Flight 103!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the World Trade Center in 1993!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the Marine barracks in Lebanon!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the military barracks in Saudi Arabia!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the American Embassies in Africa!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM bombing of the USS COLE!
REMEMBER the MUSLIM attack on 9/11/2001!
REMEMBER all the AMERICAN lives that were lost in those vicious MUSLIM attacks!

Now the United States Postal Service REMEMBERS and HONORS the EID MUSLIM holiday season with a commemorative first class holiday postage stamp.

REMEMBER to adamantly and vocally BOYCOTT this stamp when purchasing your stamps at the post office. To use this stamp would be a slap in the face to all those AMERICANS who died at the hands of those whom this stamp honors.

REMEMBER to pass this along to every patriotic AMERICAN you know

DM - True, there is a stamp commerating the Muslim EID holiday, but it is not intended as a Christmas stamp. AND, it was issued prior to 9/11. Here is a link to some additional information: http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/eidstamp.asp

Anxious to see how you handle this email...

2005-09-17T16:44:00.000-04:00

Let's see if you send it back.

We all know or knew someone like this!!

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd."

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.

My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. " They really should get lives." He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!" There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.

I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!" He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were seniors, we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football scholarship.

Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak

Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous! Today was one of those days.

I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled." Thanks," he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began. "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story."

I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others.

You now have two choices, you can: 1) Pass this on to your friends or 2) Delete it and act like it didn't touch your heart. As you can see, I took choice number 1.

"Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."

There is no beginning or end. Yesterday is history.Tomorrow is mystery. Today is a gift.

It's National Friendship Week. Show your friends how much you care. Send this to everyone you consider a FRIEND. If it comes back to you, then you'll know you have a circle of friends.

WHEN YOU RECEIVE THIS LETTER, YOU'RE REQUESTED TO SEND IT TO AT LEAST 10 PEOPLE, INCLUDING THE PERSON WHO SENT IT TO YOU.

OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

2005-09-01T10:59:00.000-04:00

Official Announcement:

The government today announced that it is changing its emblem from an Eagle to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance. A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you're actually being screwed. Damn, it just doesn't get more accurate than that."

Senior Dress Code

2005-09-01T10:56:00.000-04:00

Many of us "Old Folks" (those over 60, WAY over 60, or hovering near 60) are quite confused about how we should present ourselves. We're unsure about the kind of image we are projecting and whether or not we are correct as we try to conform to current fashions. Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations DO NOT go together and should be avoided:
1. A nose ring and bifocals
2. Spiked hair and bald spots
3. A pierced tongue and dentures
4. Miniskirts and support hose
5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads
6. Speedo's and cellulite
7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar
8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor
9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge
10. Bikinis and liver spots
11. Short shorts and varicose veins
12. Inline skates and a walker

And last, but not least my personal favorite:
13. Thongs and Depends

Please keep these basic guidelines foremost in your mind when you shop.

You are My 7

2005-09-01T10:53:00.000-04:00

I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't,
Than live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is.

You are my 7 in 7 seconds. I am not breaking this. No way! I'M TOLD THIS WORKS!!!!!

Bishop T.D. Jakes "7 Second Prayer." Just repeat this prayer and see how God moves!!

"Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart (or, I'm so grateful You're in my heart), and bless me, my family, my home, and my friends, in Jesus' name. Amen."

Pass this message to 7 people {EXCEPT YOU AND ME}. You will receive a miracle tomorrow. I Hope that you don't ignore and let God bless you

Friends

2005-09-01T10:32:00.000-04:00

This morning when the Lord opened a window to Heaven, he saw me, and he asked: My child, what is your greatest wish for today?

I responded: "Lord please, take care of the person who is reading this message, their family and their special friends. They deserve it and I love them very much".

The love of God is like the ocean, you can see its beginnings but not its end.

This message works on the day you receive it. To some it may sound dumb, but the person who sent this to me was impressed with the time. Let us see if it is true.

ANGELS EXIST, but some times, Since they don't all have wings we call them FRIENDS, SUCH AS YOU.

Pass this on to your true friends.

1022, A Prayer for Today

2005-08-05T22:30:00.000-04:00

If you pray this prayer, change the number in the subject box before forwarding the message so people can SEE how many people have done so.

Dear Lord, I thank You for this day. I thank You for my being able to see and to hear this morning. I'm blessed because You are a forgiving God and an understanding God. You have done so much for me and You keep on blessing me. Forgive me this day for everything I have done, said or thought that was not pleasing to you.. I ask now for Your forgiveness.

Please keep me safe from all danger and harm. Help me to start this day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude. Let me make the best of each and every day to clear my mind so that I can hear from You.

Please broaden my mind that I can accept all things.

Let me not whine and whimper over things I have no control over. Let me continue to see sin through God's eyes and acknowledge it as evil. And when I sin, let me repent, and confess with my mouth my wrongdoing, and receive the forgiveness of God.

And when this world closes in on me, let me remember Jesus' example -- to slip away and find a quiet place to pray. It's the best response when I'm pushed beyond my limits. I know that when I can't pray, you listen to my heart. Continue to use me to do Your will.

Continue to bless me that I may be a blessing to others. Keep me strong that I may help the weak. Keep me uplifted that I may have words of encouragement for others. I pray for those who are lost and can't find their way. I pray for those who are misjudged and misunderstood. I ray for those who don't know You intimately. I pray for those who will delete this without sharing it with others. I pray for those who don't believe. But I thank you that I believe.

I believe that God changes people and God changes things. I pray for all my sisters and brothers. For each and every family member in their households. I pray for peace, love and joy in their homes that they are out of debt and all their needs are met.

I pray that every eye that reads this knows there is no problem, circumstance, or situation greater than God. Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight. I pray that these words be received into the hearts of every eye that sees them and every mouth that confesses them willingly.

This is my prayer.

In Jesus' Name, Amen

Pass this message to 8 people except you and me.

Don't ignore and God will bless you. Know that you are already blessed by the person who sent this to you

A Night on the Town

2005-08-05T22:29:00.000-04:00

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her out to some place expensive...................

So I took her to a gas station!!!!!!!

Envelopes

2005-08-05T22:26:00.000-04:00

Subject: Thought You Might Enjoy Knowing This

Anyone lick Envelopes!

I used to work for an envelope company. Our plant supervisor used to work in the Chicago plant and told us not to lick the envelopes because they would often find dead rats at the bottom of the glue barrel (after thousands of envelopes had been glued and shipped). EEWW!

I work in a factory and we have 2 employees who used to work in an envelope factory. They told me that when the machine jams up, they use whatever water is handy to thin out the glue. This includes water that they just mopped the floor with. Since then, I've avoided licking envelopes...

If you lick your envelopes... You won't anymore!!! A woman was working in a post office in California. One day she licked the envelopes and postage stamps instead of using a sponge. That very day the lady cut her tongue on the envelope. A week later, she noticed an abnormal swelling of her tongue. She went to the doctor, but they found nothing wrong. Her tongue was not sore or anything. A couple of days later, her tongue started to swell more, and it began to get so sore, that she could not eat. She went back to the hospital, and demanded something be done. The doctor took an x-ray of her tongue and noticed a lump. He prepared her for minor surgery. When the doctor cut her tongue open, a live cockroach crawled out!!!! There were roach eggs on the seal of the envelope. The egg was able to hatch inside of her tongue, because of her saliva. It was warm and moist... This is a true story reported on CNN.

Andy Hume wrote: "Hey, I used to work in an envelope factory. You wouldn't believe the things that float around in those gum applicator trays. I haven't licked an envelope for years!"

To All: I used to work for a print shop (32 years ago) and we were told NEVER to lick the envelopes. I never understood why until I had to go into storage and pull out 2500 envelops that were already printed for a customer who was doing a mailing and saw several squads of roaches roaming around inside a couple of boxes with eggs everywhere. They eat the glue on the envelopes. I think print shops have a harder time controlling roaches than a restaurant. I always buy the self-sealing type. Or if need be, I use a glue stick to seal one that has the type of glue that needs to be wet to stick.

PLEASE PASS THIS ON, if you like TO YOUR FRIENDS. After reading this you will never lick another envelope or stamp ever again. Have a nice day, & keep your tongues where they belong!

1975 vs. 2005

2005-08-05T22:21:00.000-04:00

1975: Long hair
2005: Longing for hair

1975: KEG
2005: EKG

1975: Acid rock
2005: Acid reflux

1975: Moving to California because it's cool
2005: Moving to California because it's warm

1975: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2005: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

1975: Seeds and stems
2005: Roughage

1975: Hoping for a BMW
2005: Hoping for a BM

1975: The Grateful Dead
2005: Dr. Kevorkian

1975: Going to a new, hip joint
2005: Receiving a new hip joint

1975: Rolling Stones
2005: Kidney Stones

1975: Being called into the principal's office
2005: Calling the principal's office

1975: Screw the system
2005: Upgrade the system

1975: Disco
2005: Costco

1975: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2005: Children begging you to get their heads shaved

1975: Passing the drivers' test
2005: Passing the vision test

1975: Whatever
2005: Depends

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things.

The people who started college this fall across the nation were born in 1986.
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
The CD was introduced the year they were born.
They have always had an answering machine.
They have always had cable.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
They never heard: "Where's the Beef?", "I'd ! walk a mile for a Camel", or "de plane, Boss, de plane".
They do not care who shot J. R. and don't even have any idea who J. R. is.
McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

Do you feel old yet? Pass this on to the other old fogies on your list. Notice the larger type, that's for those of you who have trouble reading.

God is Like.....

2005-08-05T22:15:00.000-04:00

A fifth grade teacher in a Christian school asked her class to look at TV commercials and see if they could use them in some way to communicate ideas about God. Here are some of the results: scroll down.

God is like... BAYER ASPIRIN
He works miracles.

God is like... a FORD
He's got a better idea.

God is like...
COKE He's the real thing.

(This is great) God is like... HALLMARK CARDS
He cares enough to send His very best.

God is like... TIDE
He gets the stains out that others leave behind.

God is like... GENERAL ELECTRIC
He brings good things to life.

God is like... SEARS
He has everything.

God is like... ALKA-SELTZER
Try him, you'll like Him.

God is like... SCOTCH TAPE
You can't see him, but you know He's there.

God is like... DELTA
He's ready when you are.

God is like... ALLSTATE
You're in good hands with Him.

God is like... VO-5 Hair Spray
He holds through all kinds of weather.

God is like... DIAL SOAP
Aren't you glad you have Him? Don't you wish everybody did? (that one is my favorite)

God is like... the U.S. POST OFFICE
Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet nor ice will keep Him from His appointed destination.

Forward this to other people so that they can know what God is like.......

BLESSINGS FROM OUR HOUSE TO YOUR HOUSE

Daddy, how was I born?

2005-08-05T22:13:00.000-04:00

Little Johnny asks: "Daddy, how was I born?"

Ol' Dad Says:
Ah, my son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Well, you see your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on AOL. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a blessed little Popup appeared and said:

"You've Got Male!"

A new Christmas Gift Idea from Martha Stewart

2005-08-05T22:08:00.000-04:00

READ THIS FIRST - THEN LOOK AT THE PICTURE!!!!

Let me know your sizes. Christmas is tight this year.

How to make bedroom slippers out of maxi pads:

You need four maxis to make a pair.
Two of them get laid out flat, for the foot part.
The other two wrap around the toe area to form the top. Tape or glue each side of the top pieces to the bottom of the foot part.
Decorate the tops with whatever you desire, silk flowers, etc.

These slippers are:

Soft and Hygienic
Non-slip grip strips on the soles
Built in deodorant feature keeps feet smelling fresh
No more bending over to mop up spills
Disposable and biodegradable!
Environmentally safe.

Three convenient sizes: Regular, Light day, and Get out the Sand Bags.

See the nifty slippers for yourself....

Mayonaise Jar and Coffee

2005-08-05T22:05:00.000-04:00

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar...and the coffee...

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.
"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, " I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things: God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car.

The sand is everything else.....the small stuff. "If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18 holes of golf. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal."

Take care of the things that really matter first.....the golf balls. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled.

"I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

Please share this with someone you care about.